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Letting go - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Letting go

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
Image Image Image Image FANTASTIC!!!! Image Image Image Image X
Well done to you all. It's fantastic that you bought him up to be as independant as possible even though his Downs makes it more difficult for him.

I'm pleased to hear that he was able to start walking home on his own too because sometimes being in a different situation can be scary enough for any person, what with not knowing what to do.
Thanks for sharing that one with us, Excalibur. And while the law only changed 39 years ago to "allow" kids like J to have an education, it was only 10 years before that when parents were still being recommended to put their child into the local "mental handicap" hospital and forget about them. Things have moved on a long way.
I wish my daughter had as much confidence as your son Rob.

Its true what they say there are different levels of Downs Syndrome and your son must be right there at the top
wonderful achievement excalibur but have to take issue with Charles Image
Many children with disabilities are still not getting an education, what they are getting is compliance with the law in that they attend a building that says "school". Having said that I don't expect my youngest sons school to be able to teach him the level of independence Excalibur sons has because that isn't possible but I do expect them to keep up with us in regards to trying to get him to reach his full potential whatever that may be.
I had a visit from SW yesterday and she spent her time advising me on out of work benefits for both my boys as when they leave school they will not be going into employment, isn't it wonderful that this woman can know this for a 13yr old and a 15yr old, but then again she has many years experience of dealing with the kids coming out of my kids childminding services, whoops sorry I meant to say school Image
Vicky
Well done Rob and son - many hard years of fighting I imagine to get to this point.
I whole heartedly agree about the state being risk adverse. You have to fight yourself to get your caree to progress, as the state seems to want to hold them back with boxes and assessments and no creative thinking.
Good for you for fighting. I know personally how hard it is to do this on your own and defy the authorities.
I don't know that Jay is any brighter or more able than other kids with DS, but he has been blessed with robust good health, excellent hearing and good corrected vision, so there are less barriers in his way. I actually thought he was very slow in some areas of development, especially the three "R"s - despite heroic efforts by his wonderful teachers/aides and learning support staff it just seemed to go over his head. He finally started to progress with puberty - there was a definite period of intense growth and development when lots of lights went on. But his reading skills are still poor and need a lot of remedial work.
One-to-one support from school was essential for some of his education, and I dread to think how he would have coped if just left at the back of the class to go to sleep all the time.

The In Control program has given his the chance to really expand his horizons and do lots of different activities that have stretched him mentally, physically, and imaginatively, I think that is one big difference. But socially he is still painfully shy at times in company, monosyllabic - maybe that is mainly a teen thing and he will grow out of it. Because when he gets going he can certainly talk the hind leg off a donkey!
Because when he gets going he can certainly talk the hind leg off a donkey!
Hmmmm I wonder whom he takes after Image
Sarah can read brilliantly but she hasnt a clue what shes read, to be honest her memory is shocking as she cant remember what shes done at school by the time she gets home! She can write but her spelling is like a 5 year olds. Shes good on the PC but would struggle to make a sandwich or a hot drink.
Her boyfriend who si 18 with Downs can be left alone whilst his Mum works and he can cook himself a meal but yet he can hardly read or write and his speech is hard to understand.

it seems they excel in certain things and not in others
My sis can make a sandwich and do lots of things in the kitchen but she can't read at all and can just about write her name and has limited speech. Downs people go on developing all their lives- my sister is far more assertive than many younger Downs adults who are more capable thsn she is. She enjoys excellent health and is a very dignified little lady- it gets her and me mad when people treat her like a little girl which many people do. She has her funny little ways- mild OCD behaviour which I have read is very common in Downs People and a short attention span,but yes all people with Downs have different strengths and weaknesses.