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I am raging!! - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

I am raging!!

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
but she was making out how tiresome she is and almost like they dread her coming in the shop
"To err is human, to forgive, divine".
Dealing with customers can be very stressful, and they are human after all. How would you feel if the shop closed?
We have probably all said something similarly crass at some time ... they had no idea who you were and probably would be mortified to know how much offence they had caused.
Just back from my evening out and feeling a bit calmer. Thank you all so very much for listening and for your comments and also the lovely PM I received.

Rosemary mentioned letting my anger out and I know 100% this is right, problem is I need time to let it out! Image Like I said, my day tomorrow is fully booked with Mum/hospital and there's no time for me. Not that I'm complaining but it's a bit sad really when you can't even find time to let go of your anger isn't it? Image Image

Five mins after I left the shop I thought about going back and really letting my anger out in there but fortunately decided against it! DD asked why I was upset and I told her it's nothing she's done and not to worry.

It is really weird about holding my anger in .... I was seeing an accupuncturist last year and the last time I saw her she was discussing changes she'd observed in me since I'd been going for treatment. She actually said "don't answer me if you don't want to but I really feel there's a lot of anger inside you and I think it needs to come out. I can feel it through the needles." Isn't that amazing? Image We have never discussed my DD and I have never mentioned my personal life, except that I'm married with grown up kids. Then she said "you always present as a really happy, lively person but my needles tell me otherwise." To my eternal shame I fibbed and said I had no idea what she meant! Image Image

Anyway, thanks again you lovely people and I will write the letter on Thursday.
Excalibur - that was spooky too - we posted at the same time. Image I will sleep on your words.
Hi Penny I hope you do write to the Headoffice... volunteers or not they are representing the Charity....it is true we all have said and maybe done things we regret however, that should not deter you from expressing your concerns as that is the only way situations like this can be made a thing of the past. Imagine if you did nothing and your daughter overheard them speaking this way or one of their other faithful customers.

I do anything to avoid confrontation but this situation needs addressing....maybe they have not had any Disability Awareness Training? My friend once told me common sense is NOT VERY COMMON how true that is...

Please let us know how you get on.

Hillsong xx
The best of luck whatever you decide to do, but please take into consideration you loved one in the middle of all this - after all why shouldn't she feel free to enjoy being in her favourite shop? I bet you feel like letting all hell break loose, but I suppose it wouldn't be fair on her.

Maybe they are not aware that she has a disability, and if they did then their attitude and behaviour is inexcusable. I agree the sales assistants are human, but surely they have to make their customers welcome and be helpful towards them, their attitude isn't very business-like, who would want to part with their cash in a place with those kind of people with that attitude?

Good Luck!
Hope your feeling better today but it strikes me if a similar situation arose involving gender, race or sexual orientation then there would be an outcry, if it's down to ignorance then they need to wise up quick.
penny i would write and complain, when calm, never write a letter when angry

I was in the redcross shop in town, i had taken amy to school after a few days off and we had been shopping in town,, the woman behind the till was winging about some young obviously slag mother had been in a couple of days b4 hand mentioned the clothes stands where too close to the videos so she couldnt get the wheen chair round for her kid to look and that kids like that should be shot at birth. well im gobby when it comes to defending amy and myself, yes i was 21 when i had amy, yes i was 25 at the time, but im no slag and my daughter has every right to look at videos.
I went to the counter and said-- no people like you should be shot at birth, narrow minded cow, and went on the how dare u, and never again would i shop in there and how i would tell every one i knew what she had said, i told her as well that with a face like a horses back end she should keep her trap shut . When i got home i called the head office and told them everything- she lost her job and i got a letter appologising and saying they where working on making more room for pushchairs and wheelchairs. I also got a highstreet voucher for £50 to take my daughter shopping. (so i let her have another day off school and we did!)

You can not say things like that in a shop-- if u have somethng nasty to say epreferabbly dont say it or say it in the staff room if u have to say it, not infront of customers, because people like me will mouth off and not care who hears (i emptied that shop that day!)
Thanks Pixie. I haven't written to them yet but it's on my "to do" list. I will never go in there again though and have told my daughter not to either. I had some sad news about a good friend over the weekend and my troubles kind of paled into insignificance.

I will keep you all updated and thanks again for your ears and eyes!! Image
Sarah doesnt understand money in fact she has no confidence at all when it comes to paying for something in a shop and she gets all flustered and upset, I explain to her the money she should give etc and I get sick of shop assistants rolling their eyes and sighing or other shoppers behind me ding the same as it holds them up for all of 30 seconds, I can get quite embarassed about it.

However full marks have to go to New Look staff, I dont know if they have had training for special needs customers but their kindness and patience is wonderful
Nilla that sounds like my DD. She hasn't got a clue despite years of me trying. Image She also has this habit of asking people after the transaction "have you given me the right change?" I tell her till I'm blue in the face that that's the worst thing she can say because then they KNOW that she doesn't understand money & may then try and fiddle her. But that goes in one ear and right out of the other. I always try never to give her notes of more than £5 just in case. Image If she wants new clothes/shoes or something expensive then we just use her debit card.

Most shops are fine because we have a little circuit of shops that she likes. We do get the odd one where a person will say things like "it's really easy, look ...." and they start trying to explain. They mean well I'm sure.