On Hold

[daylily]

I couldn't agree more.
my own health getting worse with every passing day.
I don't feel resentful just in limbo
Plod on day by day
Nothing really for the future but more struggling- physically, mentally and most of all financially.

[Guest]

Totally on hold. Cant walk away now, a horrible waiting game.

[paulingreece]

Hi Audrey, could not agree more, our lives are on hold, we had dreams of sailing away with Kerry Ann, till her spine collasped, now impossible, we live 400 meters from a lovely little cove with crystal clear water, we never use it or go in the sea. Every thing we do flows round Kerry Ann and her needs. So everything goes on hold, thats what comes with the territory, like it, no, just got to deal with it. Sorry Audrey, but on this one your right.

[Lazydaisy]

I feel just the same.
I think it would be easier if we had enough money not to have to worry.If we have enough money to put petrol in the car, and to go swimming,then it is a really good week, but most of the time,money is needed elsewhere.Ben needs new trousers, my husband needs new shoes, I need slippers.
I want to go to the Carers Wales Conference in Swansea, but need to make sure we do not have Rhys's inquest on the same day, as I really don't want to lose the train fare.
Yes Audrey, my life is on hold;for what I don't know.

[Guest]

Dont be sorry, glad everyone is truthful enough to say how it is.

[Lazydaisy]

no, don't be sad. I feel pleased that I can come here and talk truthfully. My husband would feel guilty if he knew how I felt sometimes,as I am a Carer for him too.

[Penny]

Audrey - you're not alone my darling!! There are days when I'd like nothing more than to keep on walking I tell you. So yes Audrey, I also feel like my life is on hold.

I went out with a girlfriend tonight. So for a couple of hours I relaxed and lost myself in a film. Got home and DH said DD had gone to bed. It's still early so I went in to say good night and ask whether she needs her warmer duvet (it's cold here tonight). She's watching TV and its like I don't exist, no eye contact, no asking how I got on, no interest whatsoever. Sometimes it is so HARD and I hear myself saying "One day I won't come home" and then I hate myself for that.

But hey, we're only human and there are bound to be days when we're feeling low. So if someone comes on saying we should all be positive all the time, it's good in theory, that's all I'm saying!

Anyway, to all of us how are feeling like Audrey ..... hope you all have a good sleep and wake up refreshed and ready to face another day.

[Caring_Mind]

I'm sad we all feel this way, but hey, think how worse it would be if we never get to let these feelings out?
I used to think that money didn't matter - and I suppose it didn't to a point, but now - wow! -what a difference. Of course money helps. ....for a start it would be one less stress to beat us down with!
Hey ho, onwards we go - we just gotta get this village where we can all live together!
- erm, anyone know of any pretty little villages for sale?

[flipflap]

I don't enjoy being a carer for my husband, he doesn't enjoy me being his carer either, but we are stuck with each other, unfortunately!

[Nilla]

I dont mind the caring of Sarah though when she gets her autistic head on I could scream as I just dont exist, but most of the time shes lovely even though I have to see to her personal needs. What I hate is this date July 24th 2005 thats the day my life changed forever when Mum had her stroke, since then I dont have a life of my own, if I am staying in she rings every 30 mins to check I havent gone anywhere without her, gone are the days when I could go shoppin alone, meet friends for a coffee etc etc.

I am not me anymore and I have these horrible thoughts that if Mum lives to 90 like my nn then I will be an old lady and wont be able to enjoy the freedom anymore.

As for the money tell me about it, even though Paul works his wage is rubbish so we struggle