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Gender of Carer - Page 3 - Carers UK Forum

Gender of Carer

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
Pete the Paint

No offence taken. it’s my own fault for not making my point clearer Image
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Eun
My Rob can have up to 18 different care workers (mostly female) in a week coming in to do intimate personal care and then a different lot the next week. primary school which he finds really embarassing
I had the same problem of different carers coming in and out three times a day, its not right in my opinion I would suggest you read;

Dignity in Care for domicillary care providers published November 2009.

http://www.dh.gov.uk/en/Publicationsand ... DH_4083661
if they have the low cut tops on and the bare midriffs . Image
Eun
In that case Eun, they are probably not dressed appropriately and I would notify their employer. Nurses and care workers should wear simple unisex type clothing, make-up, jewellery, and revealing clothes are a no-no, surely? I think thats why nurses got rid of all the fetishistic frilly caps, black stockings and so on, it was becoming a pantomime joke!
I think it should be personal choice, so in the case discussed here then there is no problem, however I would not want a male carer gay or straight looking after my personal care should I ever need it, indeed I refused a male trainee midwife at my oldests birth admittedly had been going to the hospital for the usual checks before birth and a muslim lady there was refusing all male care which gave me the courage to speak up.
Vicky
I think it should be personal choice, so in the case discussed here then there is no problem, however I would not want a male carer gay or straight looking after my personal care should I ever need it, indeed I refused a male trainee midwife at my oldests birth admittedly had been going to the hospital for the usual checks before birth and a muslim lady there was refusing all male care which gave me the courage to speak up.
Vicky
You may not want it, and neither may I; but the customer isnt always right. Try to look at it from the care providers perspective. Let's say an NHS cottage hospital or private nursing home in a smaller town. They may have maybe only two nurses on the ward at night, and whilst they try their best to mix it on the rota, one nurse phones in sick and the only available subsistute from an agency is a bloke. I mean, what can they do?

Or there are two vacancies, and four candidates, of which by far the best two are men?

I used to manage a community nursing service for people with learning disabilities, and we got complaints because both nurses on one patch team were men, and both were black. In both cases we appointed the best candidates for the job. What else could we do, legally and ethically?
I wouldn't look at it from the providers point of view because it wouldn't be them having to receive. Colour would not be an issue for me at all but gender very definitely would be, course if we live in a society where we don't have a choice and I couldn't afford to pay privately then of course I would just have to lump it, not the same as agreeing with it though.
Vicky
I personally do not want any stranger providing my personal care which seems quite irrational until you realise this is more an issue of consistency and having the same people who are sensitive to your feelings and treat you with dignity and respect regardless of their gender, race etc. rather than a stream of strangers of the same gender, etc. who simply see you as a body to be washed and dressed as quickly as possible so that they can move on to the next client. We have had both types of carers of both genders for my husband and it is attitude and skills which matter, not gender, race or any other physical attributes. I think that Rachel is right to stick to the workers who care for her mother, clearly they provide consistency and a high level of care and Rachel and her mother are happy with, the neighbours have absolutely no right to interfere with their care arrangements based on their own prejudices.
All above is relevant
Rachel asked the question what you think?
Vicky expressed her personal opinion
Parsfia confirmed her personal opinion
And so did i!
Surely it’s about choice or is it? Attitudes are about a fundamental philosophy based on existence of knowledge and values, reasoning ,mind and language used.
Where do you draw the line with choice? All prejudice is irrational, and it takes many forms. So what do you do about (say!) a gay man who refuses to be cared for by straight people, a Jehovah's witness (aged 14) who supposedly doesnt want a blood transfusion even if they die, or a paranoid person who has a phobia about carers with nose hair?
Yes, if you have infinite amounts of money to throw at this problem, then you probably get to call the shots. No doubt Rod Stewart will always get blonde nurses if that is his wish. Probably a blonde undertaker too! But for the rest of us, we grit our teeth and get on with it. And in, say, an operating theatre with maybe six or seven people of different colours and creeds working on you to get you back on your feet, you aint got much choice but to breathe deep and go under.
Excalibur

The care workers from social work all wore uniforms, disposable gloves and disposable aprons etc but the SW dept withdrew their staff and put this agency in over which we had no choice - it was either this or nothing.

The agency staff don't wear uniforms. What is annoying is that due to infection control they make Rob use a clean tissue for every grogger which is fair enough but then they don't wear aprons or disposable gloves or even use alcohol hand gel. They wear their muddy boots that they have been working in the garden in and traipse mud all over my carpets. One of them accidentily scraped Rob's thumb with their dirty fingernails (from gardening) and his thumb took weeks to heal.

I wish we could win the lottery and we could get tell them all to get the hell out of our house Image

Eun
if they donthave a uniform on dont let them in- they most roberly dont have an ID badge either!

I had a lovely blue top thing to wear with balck trousers (or jeans when it was cold!) and it was uncomfy and impracticle as the poppers wernt that good and a vest top int he summer under was a bit warm- wouldnt ever go to some ones house with out it on though


ANd as for when im older i plan to be a dirrrrty lil old lady and i want a fit, stapping young lad to come in and do my cares and make me feel young and that in younger days i so could have had him . I have no plans to be grumpy - i wanna be the old bird even the teenagers talk to (coz some ones gona have to help me light a fag up the bus stops!) I most proberly will take up skiing or some thing. but thats just me- it was all men that delievered amy, and after all that i actualyl have no dignanty left. but thats just me, if im looked after i dont think it will bother me.

every one is different in wot they want and their needs- care agencies are supposesed to tailor the carers for that- if they dont then the agencie isnt worth dealing with - its a very personal thing and if any oen isnt happy then change carer or agencie or both. We are supposed to have all these choices- use them!