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Extreme Caring Situations - Page 3 - Carers UK Forum

Extreme Caring Situations

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
Duncaring, no doubt you have, like me, done 'everything' you could have done for Auld Lang Syne. Since regaining my peace of mind I've now restarted doing what I set out to do with my life,at the age of 73 that I couldn't do as a Carer.
Helping our adopted children spend their inheritance before I even pop my clogs and they put my ashes on the Postbus in some far off corner my beloved Scotia!
I'm now 'at' music,photography,languages,science,fine art painting,modern art sculptures in me back garden,guinea pigs,planting veg,short stories and writing down my reminiscences etc. In fact anything at all that's not useful! Hours on the net since I got me iPad.
Pat and I first met when we were 13 years old and there was never another girl in my life.
I don't know where that 60 years has gone and Pat was ill nearly all of them.
I hope you can now be selfish for yourself and do what you need to do just for you!
Talk of being selfish, be selfish for yourself Carers, this country does not need TWO sick people to look after:- the Cared For AND the Carer!
This conversation I give to you from some years back. My wife's top Renal Consultant:-
Steve,(me on first name terms with he!). " How are you Roy? "
Me, "Oh I'm Ok, Steve, thanks for asking"
Steve, " No, what I meant was HOW ARE YOU,Roy?"
Me, " Well actually Steve I'm well nigh suicidal!"
Steve," Go to your GP Roy and tell him I said you operate a Branch of my hospital on our behalf in your own home. Without you WE couldn't function in keeping Pat alive."
He appointed me a lay Diagnostic Medical Practitioner as well as a husband and Carer.
Needless to say neither my GP nor the Government would acknowledge this as a fact.
37 pills a day, 4 plus Insulin injections a day, constant day and night medical obs and interventions for Pat by yours truly to save her life every day and night.
No wonder I went barmy!
DC you're a naughty little midget! I am 5ft nothing, extremely hairy and very warlike when it comes to abuse of Carers like us. I remind myself of a Viking jumping off a Longship to give the powers that should be but ain't,a good seeing to!
I make Eric Bloodaxe look like a pacifist. My Claidheamh Mhor is ever ready and my Targe to hand to ward off the slings and arrows of outrageous misfortune.
I have been campaigning about the plight of Carers to my MP, the NHS, the Secretary of State for Health,the Home Office, Primary Care Trust, the Royal College of Physicians, Continuing Health Care Provisions, hospital Chief Executives, Social Services, Physiotherapy Services! RNIB - you name 'em, they've all had an ear bashing from me.There is no one in health care who hasn't cringed at the very sound of my name!
20 years or more banging my head against brick walls and to no avail.
As a Carer just 28 days holiday A YEAR, including sick leave and having to tell the Carers' Unit in Belfast where I am and what I'm doing in case I get a few hours off from working myself to death! For days,nights,weeks,months and years on end. Giving up my job and promotions, depleting my Pension Rights for ever and now living my 'retirement' alone.
I've had a look Roy and can't find any evidence that any of your posts were removed by the moderating team.
Hi Roy

I am exactly the same as you. I had only one skin problem before I became a carer, eczema, which started when I lived next door to a senile man who thought it was his building and a young woman and wee kid were not entitled to be in his building. He used to send the police to us every Tuesday for stealing his doormat or plant pots. I know he was ill but as a single mum with a child I did not need the hassle. There again it was the lack of care from the professionals that was at fault. I was so busy caring for my dad that I neglected myself. I now have a number of rest of my life illnesses. I fought tooth and nail to try to get him appropriate help. I too have written tons of letters and I think my name is hated throughout the system. I don't care. That is only the polite me! I mean to do a whole load more writing yet. I used to type at 80 wpm and I think I hit that again with sheer temper. Maybe one day I will not be so polite.

The main query is WHY DO CARERS HAVE TO FIGHT ALL THE TIME? We are saving the government millions and they dont listen to us. Do they not get it that our children can see what happens to us and that they will never be carers. If they treated carers well now they would have carers in the future but they are not smart enough to see that. It does not help carers.

Claymore sharpening here and ready for the battle. Maybe I should borrow the Faerie Flag from Dunvegan!

Duncaring
No I mum I have no doubt at all that it is me and my technophobes that caused the loss of my posts!!! DC I have seen the Faerie Flag in Dunvegan castle and the Dungeon too where Authority would have put me given the chance in return for my Sedition against the State of the Nation. Barabbas got nothin' on me in my hate of the Pontius Pilate attitude of those who condemn Carers to a living Hell on Earth! I live in hope that one day I shall see Pat again and tell her I would do it all over again given half the chance.
Mention of fairies reminds me that Thomas The Rhymer was supposed to be away with the fairies for years on end- I reckon it was just the Single Malt Uisghe Beithe that was his prob!
Slainte is all I can say as I down my third dram of Dalwhinnie with me Oatcakes!
I do eat Scots Porage Oats straight out of the box too,uncooked,me Spirtle lying unused with me Sgian Dubh on the kitchen floor.
My eczema disappeared two weeks after Pat died never to return. I had folders over a foot high of letters etc I wrote whilst Caring- these too went out with the rubbish as it made me cry to read them! And the pathetic replies I got from all and sundry. The latter an indictment of the system that preys on our lives, or lack of lives personally.
DC I reckon you and I should meet up sometime on the site of the Battle of Bannockburn and or Culloden Muir and bury the hatchet in the Scottish and English Parliamentarian's heads and see how they like it up 'em!
We'd make a fine Anglo- Scottish Alliance all the way to Strasbourg and back again?
Roy
It just shows that the struggles of carers are the same throughout the UK.

Duncaring
DC Isle of Skye,yes but apart from that only on the mainland.There is nowhere north of the Loch Lomand and Menteith Highland Fault Lines that I couldn't drive you to without so much as looking at a map! I study geomorphology and the pre-history of Caledon from 400 odd million years ago and have spent hours on end looking at the Quartzite topped hills of Torridon and the Red Sandstone peaks of Coigach and Lochinver. Passers-by think I'm nuts and I've given Highland Geology history lessons to French,German and Dutch visitors before now. Even some English people if I trap them into submission and their coach driver is having a crafty fag behind their bus! What I don't know I make up as I go along and they don't know no different, do they! I am known as Norman Knowall by all and sundry and people hide when they see me coming.
DC like many Scots I'll bet you didn't know that Glencoe is the result of a collapsed 'Caldera' of ancient volcanic activity. People come from all over the world to see where the science of Geology was born, IN AND BY A SCOTSMAN,who else! You lot of warlike desperadoes up there have got a lot to answer for, no wonder Edward the Hammer of the Scots didn't fancy you much! Never mind,we're all friends now, apart from Football!