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dont no if iam comeing or going - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

dont no if iam comeing or going

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
221 posts
i am trying to slow down but as soon as i do i feel like i am going mad idont want him to come back i dont want any more i am fed up with the blood the pee every think i am sick of crying i am sick of getting no help he is not the same your be talking to him suddenly he gone i dont no were, his eyes seem to look past you and he hasent heard a word i hate it i feel i dont no scared lost alone all of it ,this morning the lady that comes in to wash and dress terry turnd up she new he was in hospital but said the office didnt tell her so she came and that means she will get paid she was laughting is that all we are easy money i hate them comeing in i am going to try and stop them ,not once have the dn got in touch while he has been in hospital to see how he is getting on all this so called care is a load of b*********** its my own fault i have got to shout and scream i will try in the morning first i wil get in touch with the socal worker trouble she is leaving friday but i will try and do somethink love to you all x
Dear fairymagic,
You have been treated very badly, and feel very stressed. When I read your message just now I was reminded so much of how I felt when I was given a day off from caring for my son with LD, for the first time since he was born 8 years previously. No one is Superwoman, and you have been left to care for far too much for far too long. We put a brave face on and struggle to carry on, but it's very difficult, and so very tiring, and now you've even forgotten how to rest and relax, there seems no peace anywhere. All I can say is that I'm thinking of you, but wish I could do more. Make sure that your social worker understands just how stressed you are, and before you leave get the name of whoever will be dealing with you in future. All too often we are left in limbo and at the moment they must not do that to you. Take care.
Everything I might have written has been posted here by others.I can only write "Ditto".

A massive hug for you.Poor Terry too is going through the mill.I feel for you both.
HUGS, Ann.
Nobody cares but us. It shouldn't be like this.
well he is home dosent look well more frial i gave him some dinner he ate a little then went to sleep,the socal worker at the hospital phoned me and said she thinks terry needs a lot more care than i can give wow really and she feels we both need more help i told her whats been going on so she is getting in touch with the socal serves so that a diffrant acancey will be used because he needs a lot more care and the ones that are doing it are not much good the ward is also going to get in touch with dn bosses to get a care plan that thay have to act on we will see because i no its all talk always is ,there saying terry is at hi risk of respiratory failure ,and ox saturation of 88-92 must be amed for what dose all that mean its on a card he has to have at all times last week it was 78 when thay came back for him dose it mean he could stop being able to breath what would i do just another worry hopefully things will get better i do hope so love to you all xxxxx
socal worker at the hospital phoned me and said she thinks terry needs a lot more care than i can give wow really and she feels we both need more help
So why have they sent him home without the extra care in place Image
Fairy you both are being so let down. I hope that something gets sorted properly this time.
I know its no use suggesting anything because you've tried everything already. Hopefully the hospital social worker will help
I wish I could do more than send cyber hugs but please have one anyway
Hugs from me too. The hospital social worker could be the way to get the help you both really need, just a shame it wasn't organised before he came home. On the other hand, at least you know that he is being cared for to the best of your ability. I never felt that there were enough staff on mum's ward.
Fairymagic, they should not have discharged knowing that you couldn't cope. That makes it an unsafe discharge and it's in breach of the law.

On the "sats", it's a measure of how much oxygen is "saturating" into the bloodstream - in other words, how well your OH is breathing with or without help. As I understand it, anything under 92 isn't ideal, and 78 is very poor, which is why he went into hospital at that point. It means he needed to be on oxygen at that point, to make breathing easier.
Your post is making me very sad Fairymagic and I SO feel for you. You need someone to give you a real big hug and a bit of time just for you. Tell that social worker you need help NOW and that you have a load of on-line friends who are watching out for you so she'd better do her bit or else!!
the last 2 days he has been home have been very hard he dosent do any think just seems to have givern up wants his ox all the time and he just lays there sleeping when he is awake he doesent seem to be there now and then he will put his hand out for me to hold then seems to want to be left alone i cant be in the same room as him its to hard i cant seem to get any one to understand what our needs or mine are the matron came round today and i tryed to tell her she new because the hospital have been in touch we no you cant cope with this on your own we can get the carers to come in more i said no thats not what he needs why cant anyone just hear me he dose not need strangers comeing to wash and dress him so much its dn care he needs some one to come in and see when he cant breath when he is in pain when he is like he is now to hold his hand to show thay care to reashaw him not just to wash him bum any way she is going to get the palative nurses in thay used to come in when terry had cancer and thay were really good this is the last straw now if this dosent work out well somethink will have to give cause i cant go on x
221 posts