[phpBB Debug] PHP Warning: in file [ROOT]/phpbb/session.php on line 585: sizeof(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable
[phpBB Debug] PHP Warning: in file [ROOT]/phpbb/session.php on line 641: sizeof(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable
Carers UK Forum • Define a Carer
Page 1 of 4

Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 11:31 am
by Hazel_1510
How would you describe your job as a Carer to a person who is a Non-Carer?

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 2:51 pm
by jenny lucas
As the 'mother' of a 91 year old 'toddler'!!! (Who is, thank heavens for my sanity, now in a 'boarding school for 91 year old toddlers' - aka care home for an elderly lady, my MIL, with dementia).

(She has regular outings with me, a frail reminder to her of 'normal life' alas, sigh.)

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 3:10 pm
by Melly1
Being entirely responsible for the physical, mental, health and sociable wellbeing of my caree. Supporting with all aspects of life. Being their advocate. Being on call 24/7.

Doing this is exhausting, involves self sacrifice and can be isolating. It can also be rewarding and worthwhile.

It can be an act of love or performed out of a sense of duty, or a combination of the two.

Melly1

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 3:33 pm
by Eun
We are slaves...

Eun

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 4:40 pm
by david c
That small rubber thing on the end of toy arrows eg a sucker.

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 8:37 pm
by jenny lucas
Hazel, how would you describe it?

To me, I think the phrase is that of being 'on duty' for the caree. For some carers, that is 24/7 and incredibly intense and non-stop/full on (as it is for Eun).

One has to be unselfish to care - the more needs the caree has, the more unselfish the carer has to be. (Unless, like me, you've 'outsourced' it to professional carers.)

I've found that another key factor is whether the carer loves the caree. My caree is my MIL, and although I'm fond of her, there are no 'heartstrings' and that seriously limits how unselfish I'm prepared to be. Sad but true.

Sometimes, though, from reading some of the posts on this whole forum, I feel that carers can be too unselfish, and their carees too unappreciative! (Sometimes, of course, the lack of appreciation is not the caree's 'fault' because they have dementia. Not so sure about the ones that have depression.....maybe that will come back to bite me one day, and I'll be the one with depression!)

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 9:13 pm
by Henrietta
For the most part no one ever plans to be a carer, you are either launched into it by some crisis , or it creeps up on you unnoticed until one day , you wonder whether you might in fact be one and start reaching out to other people in the same boat comparing notes and feelings and come to the conclusion you've actually been one for some time whilst trying to carry on in a parallel normal world .

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sat Oct 17, 2015 10:06 pm
by Melly1
Henrietta wrote:For the most part no one ever plans to be a carer, you are either launched into it by some crisis , or it creeps up on you unnoticed until one day , you wonder whether you might in fact be one and start reaching out to other people in the same boat comparing notes and feelings and come to the conclusion you've actually been one for some time whilst trying to carry on in a parallel normal world .
Henrietta, you are SPOT ON!

Melly1

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 1:08 am
by Scally
Certainly not a slave ... more of a hostage! :lol:

Re: Define a Carer

Posted: Sun Oct 18, 2015 8:17 am
by Juggler
The person who didn't, or couldn't, step away from the needs of others.