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Carers attending at your home - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Carers attending at your home

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
Good point on timekeeping evedan, that was another problem we had.
Have PM'd you, Rosemary. If it helps. With 24 hour assistants for the past 16 or so years, we've seen em all and both of us have been called a few things too. Not much that we haven't experienced, from Arrogance to Zero-hearing. Image

Overall, the quality of carers we've had has been very good. It sounds like the agency supplying carers for your mum has a very poor training regime for their staff and little/no supervision.

If it's not possible to switch to a different agency, then you need to be a specific as possible with carers. When it comes to the basics, don't leave anything to chance. Keep anything the carers will need from her as seperate as possible from your own, label if necessary. Handle things like a carer not covering up your mum with a sweetly said, "mum likes to be covered", or when washing, "mum's skin is very sensitive so you will need to be extra gentle." Try not too bite your lips to hard saying the obvious to people who should already know how to care for someone properly.

I wouldn't focus too much on a carer calling your mum by the wrong name, they do care for a lot of people and many will have dementia as well. You could always put your mum's name on her door or above her bed if it's worrying to your mum.

I use carers for my dad. This only started last year because his health went downhill quite a bit and also have not had a break or even ust a day off since August 2006 I am feeling very tired. The idea of the carers coming in was to given me time to ensure that I have meals. I had got ill by skipping meals for days on end. Dad refuses to consider respite care.

I have noticed the following

1. Carers have given my dad my "weightwatcher" meals. He needs to maintain his weight.

2. Carers have used my red top milk for my dad. See above

3. They use whatever they lay their hands on to wash dishes. There is a dishmatic sponge
for dishes, a brush for pots and pans and a cloth for wiping round. They dont get that.

4. There is an every day set of china and the best set which has every item in its own plastic
bag. One carer reached over the everyday set to get a bowl of the good set and dumped
the plastic bag. Clearly didnt know that soup bowls of the good set were the ones with the
two little handles.

5. Carers have switched off everything in the kitchen including the fridge freezer.

6. This week one carer took a frozen Wiltshire meal out of the freezer and put it in the fridge
to cook the next day. The meal clearly says cook from frozen. These carers are dealing with
delicate elderly stomachs.

7. Dishes cutlery and pot and pans are rarely properly cleaned. Again these carers are dealing
delicate elderly stomachs.

8. I have a bag load of pills that they have not ensured that my dad took all his pills.

9. My dad has skin problems and the district nurses supply me with rubber gloves to apply his
creams. I have to hide the gloves all over the house in order to hang on to them. They
should be putting on the creams not me.

10. Timings can be completely out of order. i.e. lunch at 11.45 and dinner at 18.15 or lunch at
13.30 and dinner at 16.20.

The whole point of getting in the carers was to get me some time off. I am worrying myself into an early grave here with some of this carry on. There is no way I could go away and leave my dad to cope with this lot. Of course if he would co-operate and agree to respite care I could get a break. If I land in hospital he wont have much choice in what happens to him. If he co-operated he could have a say in where he is going. Carers have to have time off but we have to be able to relax and know our carees are safe.

Little Lamb
EXACTLY ..............................................................................................

Having help is not the bed of roses and the road to an easy life that people think it is.
its really sad to think that some care workers do their work in ways that are unacceptable.
This might seem obvious but there are actions you can take.
Some times its basic lack of training and the company should comply with this
.If you are looking for respite care you can always check out the homes before hand
. I worked on community care for some years and loved it.I still have contact with the husband of one of the ladies i cared for 6yrs after she passed away. He was looking after his wife 24 7 and sometimes he saw no one so although i was supposed to have an hour we ended up him talking throughout the time and me staying on. Sadly after she passed away he hardly ever goes out as he has never known any differant than caring for his wife so many years.
So what i m saying is there are some dedicated people out there its just very difficult to leave our loved ones until we are certain we have the right one for us.
My aunt has care workers attend her home to "help" her care for my uncle who has severe brain damage due to a stroke.
She has told them on numerous occasions not to try to force him out of bed or to try to force him to wake up to suit their timetable but they carried on regardless. On one occasion he got the shakes really badly and then fell and hurt himself due to having the shakes and an ambulance had to be called. He gets the shakes if he is forced to wake up before he is ready. My aunt is paying 100 pounds a month for this "service" Im absolutely disgusted by this and by the other experiences on this thread.
Diva, your aunt needs to make a complaint. It's not just poor service, it is a form of abuse.

Care workers are contract workers and paid by the job, so if they can't attend to your uncle they do not get paid. That means that they get stuck with the cost of mileage and petrol for their car and no pay. They aren't paid much in the first place, so a little understanding of things from their perspective sometimes helps.

I don't understand why, if your uncle is asleep, your aunt cannot meet the care worker at the door and either tell them to go away or asks them to do other things to help out. Instead of caring for your uncle personally they might, for example, wash his clothing or bedding or clean elsewhere. If your aunt is paying directly she could literally ask them to do anything to help her out. Car workers do all sorts of things for clients (shopping, cleaning, etc.), it's not all about personal care.
All sorts of crap do we have to put up with, including rude behaviour, basic lack of manners, intrusive beaviour, being shouted out, people refusing to leave, damaged property - antique sideboard, sofa, doors, walls, floor, stolen property, draws rifled through, poor hygeine standards at times, continence products left on the shower floor, not bothering to give my partner a drink, under feeding, overfeeding, bed bag left full from the night before and not emptied all day, wet urine soaked clothes put in the linen basket and not straight in the washer, reporting every last detail of our private lives to their manager, when it is nothing to do with them, completely ignoring what I have asked them to do and doing something entirely different without reason, not communicating correctly with my partner, so he is losing his skills, not asking my partner what his choice is just because it takes a long time to get a decision, hardly using any of the theraputic equipment, aiming for the bare minimum at certain activities, which is a big step backwards, and yes, doing things without asking my partner's permission, just to suit their timetable, even if it has a bad effect longer term, accusing me of abuse just because they don't get therapy, always responding badly to being told to do something slightly differently, challenging every single little thing I do for my partner despite my knowing infinitely more than they do about him and his condition, talking about him in front of him as though he's not there, answering their phones in the middle of providing personal care, in stead of ringing back, actually just poor to non-existant etiquette in general, lack of basic common sense and sometimes any sense of pride in their job. OH and lastly assuming he has no capacity just because getting things out of him is hard, i.e. takes time and patience. Oh, and using this to their advantage to say my partner didn't want to do something when he was really up for it just an hour before when I asked him. I could rant for ages.