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being a carer with children - Carers UK Forum

being a carer with children

Share information, support and advice on all aspects of caring.
i've been caring for my diabled husband for 10 months( he's been getting slowly worse over the last 2 years due to a disease on his spinal cord. he's had 2 major op's but they still don't know what's wrong with him ) and have only jusy realized that i'm not alone and there is help out there.(although my local social sevices have still not answered my e mails or my phone calls) we are a young family with 3 daughters and have been going throgh a very difficult time. I've had to juggle everything in our life from woking ,running the house,being a mum a wife and a carer for my dear husband(who is unable to care for himself at all) My family and our close friends have been just wonderfull i dont think i'd have got this far with out them. i'd love to here from any one who is in the same boat as me and to know how there children cope with there disabled parent. sally
Hi Sally,

I was a carer for my husband for a few years and bringing up the 5 kids, though they are now aged from 11 - 22. My youngest was about 4/5 when my husband first took ill. It was my youngest that was very protective toward his dad and would do anything for him but also the one that it hit hardest when we lost him in January.

The kids would all contribute to doing things for their dad, whether it be making him a cuppa, the odd meal or seeing to his nebulizer/medication. It might have just been small things they done for their dad but it made them feel useful and needed. They looked after him while i grabbed an hours sleep when they got in from school so i could get ready for the 'nightshift' as we used to call it. I would be up most of the night seeing to him.

Life was hard but we were happy.

hi lynne

thank you for replying to me. You must be a remarkable women to have cared for your hubby and managed to bring up 5 children !!!! our girls seem to be coping with there dad's illness in differant ways i guess there own way. the 2 eldest now both at seconary school give me a lot of gob and moan if i ask them to help me. I put that down to there age,but they do come round. the youngest one is a daddy's girl and is always sitting in his room with him doing homework or just watching telly. I have sat them all down and tried to tell them what is going on with there dad (not sure if it goes in or that they understand). i have spoke to there teachers and reports back are that they are all ok.

As yet we've no idea what our future holds my look out is that we have to live one day at a time .

thanks sally
Hi Sally,

Welcome to forum where I hope you will find much needed support.
Lynne has already shared her experiences and I agree with you,she is a remarkable woman ( talks a lot mind you,my ears still sore from the other night Image ).

There is help out there Sally if you know where to look.Please consider phoning the CarersUK helpline.They can advise on a multitude of services and also do a benefits check.

CarersLine 0808 808 7777

CarersLine is Carers UK's free advice line for carers. It is open on Wednesday and Thursday each week between 10am-12pm and 2pm-4pm. Telephone 0808 808 7777
Benefits and finances

Look forward to hearing more from you.
Take care