Evening everyone.
I have been caring for my dad for years. He's 90 and very up and down. One week we think he's dying ...two weeks later he's working in the garden. He has depression ... anxiety attacks due to bad untreatable vertigo, Parkinson's and prostate cancer.
I had to take five weeks off work to care for him earlier this year after a fall. Since then I've not had a day off... I'm either working my job or working in the home we share.
I have ten days holiday booked in Sept ...and true to form ..my dad has suddenly developed blood in his urine which has made him go into panic mode. He has seen the gp and will do again on Monday. But he's gone very withdrawn and I can sense that he's going into one of his 'im dying dont leave me ' periods. Common sense tells me its the cancer but we will see. However ..it's already making me feel like I can't reasonably go away on my holiday and if I do go how do I stop myself worrying and feeling guilty or like I'm abandoning him. He won't allow anyone else to live in with him ...he has no other care or help but me. My sister will visit him when I'm away. But as much as I feel I need the break ...I dont know how to let myself actually relax and enjoy it.
Any advice or experiences appreciated.
I have been caring for my dad for years. He's 90 and very up and down. One week we think he's dying ...two weeks later he's working in the garden. He has depression ... anxiety attacks due to bad untreatable vertigo, Parkinson's and prostate cancer.
I had to take five weeks off work to care for him earlier this year after a fall. Since then I've not had a day off... I'm either working my job or working in the home we share.
I have ten days holiday booked in Sept ...and true to form ..my dad has suddenly developed blood in his urine which has made him go into panic mode. He has seen the gp and will do again on Monday. But he's gone very withdrawn and I can sense that he's going into one of his 'im dying dont leave me ' periods. Common sense tells me its the cancer but we will see. However ..it's already making me feel like I can't reasonably go away on my holiday and if I do go how do I stop myself worrying and feeling guilty or like I'm abandoning him. He won't allow anyone else to live in with him ...he has no other care or help but me. My sister will visit him when I'm away. But as much as I feel I need the break ...I dont know how to let myself actually relax and enjoy it.
Any advice or experiences appreciated.