Advance Payment of Care Home Fees during COP Application

[Stephen_16071]

Hi all, very quickly,

Is it normal/reasonable for a care home to demand nine months payment in advance while a current resident (self-funding) is about to go through a Court of Protection application?

The justification is they fear they won't receive payment while the application goes through.

Thanks

[bowlingbun]

Stephen, you really must take control of the situation.
Tell the Care Quality Commission what this home are doing. We cannot give you any new advice.
This home is seriously ripping you off, because you are letting them!

[jenny lucas]

Stephen - they are now coming up with yet another way to rip you off!

Of course they can't have nine months fees up front. Outrageous. report them immediately.

better still, get your mum out that hellhole!

the manager is clearly one of lifes NBC (Natural Born Crooks!) - he's dreaming up one scam after another to get your mum's money.

Just refuse to pay. What's he going to do? Evict your mum? (And if he does, best thing for her!)

start looking for a better care home straight away.

does this man own the home, by the way, or perhaps is part of the family that own the home? I can't believe this is a 'real company owned' care home, as they are behaving so outrageously! sounds far more like 'someone' owns it, and it is their personal money making machine!

Please please report all this to the CQC.

[Stephen_16071]

Its a part of Purity Nursing Homes and at the moment I'm just terrified of the sound of my own phone going off. I just ignore it now because if I do answer he'll demand on coming over for instant payment.

Despite this he still inundates me with calls and saw fit to turn up at my front door at 6:50PM last night, luckily I was hidden away in the back and ignored him.

Today I've phoned Occ Therapy with a view to getting Mum home and away from this man and left a message with our Social Worker to complain and see if others have concerns.

Deep down I'm a scaredy cat who hates confrontation, but when this Man has me scared to leave my own house, let alone visit my Mum........

[Pet66]

Stephen
Court of Protection would most likely question you as to why you paid 9months upfront. So that's an out and out blackmail in my humble opinion. Please forgive this thought, but should anything happen to your mother, would you get a refund. I have a feeling he would come up with another scamming reason.

[jenny lucas]

Stephen - bullies smell fear in their victims!

it is Beyond outrageous that this man actually comes to your home.

Please make a list of all the thigns he's said and done to you (take a photo of him at your door if he comes again). record all his phone calls.

Also, I would say this is harassment - ???? if so, that's criminal.

I do understand about hating confrontation - I hated it too.....but we HAVE to stand up for ourselves.

I finally learnt to do this when I changed jobs and ended up in a place run by 'bullies' and it was either stand up for myself or run away. I finally learn the former!

I would strongly urge you take some assertiveness classes - they will teach you techniques for dealing with bullies like this appalling man.

bullies don't people who stand up for themselves!

The great thing about becoming assertive is that the more you do it the less frightening it is. This man's anger and disapproval of you (ie, because you are not giving in to him and doing what he wants) will become less and less frightening - and more and more 'outrageous' in that you will simply get ANGRY with him.

anger is a WONDERFUL freedom for those of us who were raised never to 'let anger out' (With me, only my mum was 'allowed' to be angry!) - it's incredibly liberating to just let rip and tell others what you think of them! The adrenaline rush gives you the 'power' to be angry. (Obvously, pick your targets - they must 'desreve' anger - as this dreadful man does)

Please don't label yourself a 'wimp' - so many men do, but they aren't, they are just 'programmed' never to show their 'righteous anger' at injustice.

[Stephen_16071]

Just complained to the CQC, more specifically about the individual rather than the home so will wait and see what happens.

I do appreciate everyone's advice, maybe in a few years of dealing with this kind of thing I'll be as hardcore as bowlingbun (that is meant as a compliment), I'd pay good money to see what would happen if he turned up on her doorstep unannounced.

From now on instead of tip toeing out of my room in fear of the beeping of my answer machine it will be my challenge to boldy press the delete button:-)

[bowlingbun]

Stephen, my son (now 40) was brain damaged when he was born, undiagnosed for a long time, long story.

After being expelled from playgroup he went to a special needs playgroup. When they were trying to get him to do something he couldn't/wouldn't I was told by a member of staff that I just had to "toughen up".

It really annoys me that this should be neccessary, because in an ideal world everyone in need should be treated properly and have the services they are entitled to without a fight.

[Stephen_16071]

Friday is the first day this week I've been left in silence. Maybe because I talked to Social Services and the CQC,


Is it OK to name and shame on here? I don't want what is happening to me to go to some other poor family he can get his claws into?


I'm meeting a Social Worker at Mums home to discuss her future, he'll no doubt be lurking in the background...In which case I will ask him to leave...

[bowlingbun]

Stephen,

Is mum happy at the home? Who place her there?

The manager's behaviour is beyond appalling, and is demanding so much money up front is "Financial Abuse" of a vulnerable person.

Make a formal complaint to Social Services and ask the social worker on Monday what she/he is going to do about it.