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anxiety getting even worse - Carers UK Forum

anxiety getting even worse

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Yeah so im gonna go on a bit here,

been dealing with alot of anxiety issues, it got what i thought was its worst on thursday, but since then its gotten even worse, been having similar attacks since then and last 2 days ive started trembling very visably, locked myself away from my father and uncle for fear of breaking down in front of either, only emerging to do any chores, cook or change my dads pads

gotten even worse today as uncle somehow got into the kitchen this morning and went on a massive binge eat and has been doing it most of the day to so obv im pretty on edge watching him

also the lady who comes for reablement mentioned that ss after uncles needs assessment put through referal for safeguarding, basically because kitchen is locked and uncles time in there is limited becasue of his binge eating and when down there gets fixated on food, also my previous mention of going to day centre (although he is going now 2 days a week prob even more next week), front door is usually kept locked because his tendancy to shoplift or come back from shop having got stuff on credit, she assured me i dont have a thing to worry about and its just something they have to do
the weird thing is i do believe her buuut it doesnt stop my brain constantly thinking up the worst case scenarios, im terrified now i may have totally failed my uncle and he'll be left alone with no family, same with my dad, overwhelming anxiety ive had just for a few hours past few days has lasted all day, cant shake it off at all no matter what i do, im at a point now where i cant handle it anymore, seeing doc on wed, speaking to uncles social worker tomorrow, hopefully the latter goes well as it could tip me over the edge
Hello Craig, I'm sorry you are experiencing such anxiety. I'm new to this forum so don't know your situation but can certainly sympathise with what sounds like panic attacks.
I hope you have a good result tomorrow and that the Dr will prescribe some medication to help you, I wish I could offer advice but please know that you have my best wishes and a big hug x
Hi Craig, you know your symptoms are caused by extreme stress. Go back to your GP and get him to tell SSD that due to health problems you are now UNABLE TO CARE.
Hang on in there Craig.
A lot of what you mention are typical symptoms of stress and/or anxiety.
Suggest you make a list of what worries you, then list them in priority order so you can talk to Gp or ss or whoever it is can help you solve the problem.
It's not long now until Wednesday. See if you can find something to do to take your mind off, e.g. long walk perhaps or a trip to cinema etc etc
(((Hugs)))
MrsA
Hi and welcome @anne, yeah its kind of long and hard to explain, ive tried many times and still think I fail, thank you for the kind words though

@bowlingbun, if i do that will that affect me caring for my father? i still want to do care for him, but with uncle i cant at all

@mrsaverage, i already started to keep a journal of last few days and added some notes to it with regards to last 4 years, im very good at doing that

I tried a long walk earlier today, i lasted about 5 minutes before starting worrying id break down and just went home, probly would be same with owt else public

thank you for concern though
Hi Craig
I've had a similar few days but my problems are on a lesser scale than yours and being female I've been free to cry all over everyone in the vicinity, which I have copiously. I'm not shaking either, just stuffing chocolate, cheese, alcohol and anything else which is very bad for me, but of some comfort at the moment.
Try to tell yourself that you are not the cause of the problems these two men have. You cannot be held responsible for their health and welfare all on your own.
Can you grab a couple of hours, put some earphones on and lie on your bed to relax with music?
You are doing the right thing getting outside help. Don't hold back. Tell them you are at breaking point and something must be done.
Good luck. hang on.
Elaine
Craig, you should still be able to take time out if your health needs it. Look at it from a different angle. If you soldier on without saying anything, there's a real danger of a complete mental breakdown. Shaking is a sign that you just can't cope any more. (It was what made me make a huge chaWnge a while ago). Something MUST now change. It's in everyone's interest that you have a break, and come back refreshed, with new care plans in place for both of them.

I haven't asked before, but is your dad aware that his brother is causing you so much anxiety? What does dad think about uncle moving out? Dad really should be your greatest ally in this, he shouldn't be asking you to care for both him and uncle, that's really not fair on you. His brother should really be he his responsibility, not yours. Maybe he is the key to solving this dreadful problem?
Hi elaine, ive cried a heck of alot, but yeah i just go into my room and claim i had smoke from a cigarette go in my eye, tobacco is what ive been taking comfort in, ive only managed to eat once a day this weekend so cant anything like that bah,

even told myself 1001 times im not the cause and with regards to uncle, without me the last 4 years hed be in a far worse state maybe not even alive, my only error is taking on to much and not asking for help till i started falling apart (which is me all over tbh)

Like i reffered to before ive isolated myself alot lately and i do do that mostly to drown out noise of uncle going to toilet, found Delphonics to be quite relaxing :)

i told them i was at breaking point for a good 3 weeks beford they saw me, so afraid nothing will happen, will see tomorrow
@bowlingbun you are correct, i really need to start thinking of my health, i will end up having a breakdown if i keep going on as i am

My father is aware im stressed by uncle but ive kept most of it to myself, (uncle is his brother in law btw) he wants to go to as he is causing him alot of stress and it cant be good for his ulcer and it was me who suggested the idea of just the 2 of us, no one ask me to care for uncle, it just sort of happened cause of circumstance of us living together and realising he was way worse than i thought, only been actually asked with dad which i agreed to do after discussions and thinking it over and even now in state i am still want to with some help of course
Hi Craig
Just read your post and hope things have moved in a more positive direction for you. I do know exactly how you feel in terms of the anxiety, I have battled it for several years, I have been caring for both of my parents who have dementia, they live with me. I have had several 'crisis' points, firstly your GP needs to help you, don't be afraid of medication, I resisted for a long time then started taking Citalapram and I have to agree it has helped take the edge enough to enable me to have moments when I can think more clearly instead of the constant battling emotions that block out rational thinking. Also request CBT assistance, (cognitive behaviour therapy) which will teach you ways to deal with anxiety, some of them seem really daft at first but some do work and really help!!! Finally I have used Samaritans and a charity funded counselling service. Samaritans are there to listen, not just to prevent someone wanting to take their own life as I used to think. It is crucial when the anxiety takes over and the shaking starts that you speak to someone, a complete stranger over the phone who listens without judgement, you will feel calmer and stronger. Meanwhile pursue with your GP a referral to adult health care. You are a carer and are entitled to assistance, not just financially but emotionally and with practical help too. Have you had a carers assessment? It is crucial that you do and make it very clear that your health is in jeopardy, don't be ashamed, guilty, embarrassed, I know you will feel it but they are just emotions and you have to remember that you are just as important as your father and uncle, you are entitled to live without those overwhelming emotions. Craig, I really feel for you, you have been incredibly strong to cope with what you are coping with, now take that strength to help yourself too, it will be better for you all. Well done sweetheart and keep your chin up.