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Heart Failure - Carers UK Forum

Heart Failure

For issues related to specific conditions and disabilities.
Anyone out there caring for someone with heart failure? I'd be glad to hear your experiences.
Hello Starbright,

Just wanted to welcome you to the forum.I am sure others will be long soon too to add theirs.
Do you feel comforatble telling us who you care for and what sort of experiences you have.Just means those reading will know if they can relate to your circumstances too.

Look forward to reading more from you.Please take a look round the main site too,a wealth of information to be found including links to both National and local organisations.

x x x x

I'm caring for my husband who has been ill for the last four months. He has had two spells in hospital - one of four weeks and one of three. He came home two weeks ago. He's very weak and breathless. The worst thing is that he's quite confused for a lot of the time. His doctor says it's because he's so ill - his brain can't function as normal.

We're waiting for an appointment with a heart surgeon. The cardiologist who has been treating him is very hopeful that he'll be suitable for an operation which should improve things.

I'm finding it very hard as all our family live away. I feel very isolated. My husband and I were always extremely close and had a wonderful life, but that's all gone now. We're trapped in the house and it's as if we're strangers a lot of the time. When he has lucid spells he's very upset too. Like me, he just wants our relationship to be as before. He was the one person I could always turn to if I was upset or had a problem, but now I can't do that. I'm also very tired because it seems to take all my time just caring for him, and I don't even get rest at night because the confusion makes him muddled between night and day. He's constantly waking me to ask if we can get up.

Sorry to be such a misery. I'm sure plenty of people out there have far worse problems than mine, but it's good to get things off my chest.
Hi Starbright, don't ever say sorry for being a misery, not on here anyway. We have all been there! And having somewhere to get it off your chest does you a power of good.
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Hello Starbright,
I'm sorry to hear about your husband. Myrtle is right, never apologise for letting off a bit of steam!
I hope you get good news from the cardiologist soon. I'm sure the difference after an operation will be immense.
Keep us posted on your husband's progress please.
Welcome to the forum, Starbright! Interesting user name, by the way!

As everyone else has said, don't worry about having a moan - most of us do at some time or another and it's good to let it out in a safe environment where people understand.

It sounds as if this all happened in a fairly short space of time, which makes it a lot harder to adjust to such a big change - hope the operation helps.

In the meantime, are you getting any help?
Hi Starbright,

Welcome to the forum.

Hope the cardiologist can help your husband. I was so sad when I read your posting and hope you will be able to get some help in the near future.

My dad is 87 and has had a stroke and three heart attacks, is very breathless and can not get about much unaided, but he has had a good life and is ready for the pearly gates anytime. He recently had his medication reviewed by a different specialist and what a difference, he even enjoys daycare now and asked to go out on Friday at lunchtime. Usual grumpy hippo today, but don`t suppose he has much to look forward to now. Mum died just over two years ago and they had been almost 61 years married.

Take care
Thank you all for your replies.

Since I first posted my husband has been in hospital again. I was told yesterday that there's no way he can have an operation, so basically nothing more can be done for him. He's quite well just now, but that's only because of the drugs they've been giving him. They're working to try and get him home in the next few days, but once here anything could happen. The drugs he had at home didn't control his condition very well.

I'm absolutely devastated and heartbroken because I know it's the end of the line. He doesn't know, so I've got to try and keep a brave face for him. I've been promised that help will be arranged for me to look after him.

I slept very badly last night and this morning I can't stop crying. It's not just the fact that he probably won't live much longer, it's the worry about how he'll be. I can't bear the thought of him suffering. He doesn't have pain, but he does have the awful episodes when his lungs fill with fluid and he can't breathe, then he has to be rushed to hospital by ambulance.

Can't write any more just now.

Aw Starbright (((Hugs))) your way, it's never easy is it?

You post away as often as you can.
Lot's of us here have huge caring responsibilities and understand how you feel.
God bless,

marie x