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Mental health meltdown - Page 8 - Carers UK Forum

Mental health meltdown

For issues specific to caring for someone with mental ill health.
108 posts
Well done Chridtine. Enjoy that sense of achievement. You did it all yourself. Be proud :D :D
Thank you Mrs Average xx
Good afternoon
I'm after a bit of advice because someone i know is experiencing a mental health crisis. They have had the crisis team out today and told them she feels suicidal and does not feel safe by herself. She's told me that they are looking for a bed for her but this may not happen today. Whilst she waits they are coming to see her again this evening and again in the morning. She has very recently been discharged from hospital on a section 2. It did not seem that much was done to help her while she was in hospital and she was discharged after 10 days I think. If anything she appears to be getting worse. Is this normal practice for the crisis team to leave a person who has raised concerns with them about her own safety ? She is only 20 and is struggling terribly with her mental health
The crisis team are telling her it is there job to keep her alive and ensure that she is safe...Nothing more than that.
It is common, it's actually quite good that they are coming out 3 times. Some people only get telephone calls if that. They are probably trying to source a bed, which are rare as hens teeth. Was she prescribed meds? Is she taking them?

Keep the crisis number handy but there is little more they can do short term other than refer /admit her. Samaritans may be useful too. Or anything to distract her. We used to play card games for hours and hours. Going for a walk outside helps too, any form of exercise
I'm only being a COMPLETE amateur here, so take that on board with what I say now -

on the 'distraction' front, would it be sensible for her to be 'out and about' as MUCH as possible - even if it is simply sitting in a café, or on a park bench, staring at nothing. (better still if she is doing something, like looking at a magazine, or knitting even, or maybe doing a colouring book???)

My point is that while she is in sight of other people, even strangers, she is not going to harm herself is she?

Speaking brutally, do you know what her 'suicide fantasy weapon is'? HOW is she thinking of taking her own life? I know this is gruesome, but it could make the difference of life and death for her. For example, if she is thinking of hanging herself, can you ensure there are no belts, dressing gown cords, old pairs of tights, etc etc etc. If she is thinking of cutting her veins, then no scissors, knives etc.

I'm sorry to raise such a subject, but there it is - the 'how' of suicide is something that anyone suicidal has to address as a 'real problem', and therefore needs to be countered.

Sadly, I guess one real and present danger of her being 'out and about' is that she might decide to walk into traffic. (This happened to the husband of someone I know, another widow - ghastly.)

I'm also wondering whether a team of 'sitters' could be organised on a rota, amongst her friends and family, or many even volunteers for mental charities?

As a 'last resort', could she take sufficient sleeping pills to 'knock her out' (but obviously not enough to do the dreadful deed)

Does anyone know WHY she is SO unhappy? Poor girl - one day, one can only hope, she will be looking back to this dark time of her life, and being so GLAD she never took that last final step of desolation.....
This might be even 'further out'....but, could she be taken as a visitor to a hospice, I wonder?

I wonder if seeing those who have no choice but to die, might show her that she DOES have a choice, and for the sake of honouring those who have no choice but to die, SHE will not insult them by ending her own life 'unnecessarily'.

'Now Choose Life'.

Not everyone has that choice. My husband didn't, and nor do far, far too many of us.

I do understand that those who take their own lives FEEL they have 'no choice but to die'......but the reality is they DO have that choice. Only they themselves can take it from themselves. They have a power over their own life and death that those condemned to die because of physical illness are denied.
Good evening
If like to post a update on the young lady I was trying to help. The home treatment team found her a bed the next day and it seems to be going well. They found her a room in a supported accommodation house which has staff resident there also at all times. There is another young woman there around about her age which she likes as it is someone to talk to and maybe engage in activities together that they may both enjoy. She wasn't coping at all in the hospital where she was recently discharged from but seems a lot happier in this type of setting. We have spoken and she appears more confident about a positive route to beginning recovery. I'm just so relieved they have found her the place that they have because I know this will help her tremendously. She suffers from a low self esteem alongside her mental health issues and we talked about her writing a diary for example, listing all the things that she likes about herself which I know can be quite negative but simple little things such as how lovely she does her make up, what she likes best about that, how we baked cakes together and now she can do this by herself, these are just a couple of examples out of a list she drew up. I hope she receives support in regards to helping her build up her self esteem because it is just as important to address as her mental health difficulties. She messaged me earlier to say she feels this is her time now to get better, where she is helps and the support they will be giving her. It was lovely to hear that and I'll keep the forum updated as to get progress. Thank you for all your replies
Christine xx
That sounds a big improvement!

One other way to improve low self-esteem is to turn 'outwards' and help others....by helping others we realise that WE are contributing something, ie, that we are 'worth something' because if we did not do what we are doing to help others, that help would not be happening.

I do appreciate that it can be challenging to help other human beings, when we are so down ourselves, which is why helping at an animal sanctuary, something like that - maybe even taking an elderly person's dog for a walk - can be a great way to start.

Or maybe working 'back stage' in a charity shop - sorting through the donations. Less 'customer facing' but a job that is very appreciated by the charity shops. There is nice camaraderie too.

It's SO important for each of us to discover what we are good at - in these times of 'me me me social media' we can all too easily 'believe' what 'everyone else' is seeming to be achieving 'effortlessly'....it's so important to realise that most folk are 'putting it on' not necessarily out of vanity and conceit, but out of their own fears and inadequacies as well.

Most of us are less confident than we give out. And anyway, the ones who are uber-confident are the pain-in-the-backsite conceited cows that nobody likes anyway!

A dreadful article on Why Narcissists Get On In Life was in the papers recently - they 'con' everyone into believing what they believe about themselves, ie, that they are God's gfit and the sun shines out of them!!!!!
Good evening
It's now official,I've passed my level 3 in understanding mental health. I am just awaiting my certification. I'm going on to do a level 2 in understanding children and young adults mental health next. I thoroughly enjoyed the course I have just completed and am looking forward to starting my next one. I had always put off studying for one reason or another but decided to have a shot and see how I did. I'm so glad that I did. Now it's time to get pro active and see what employment roles are out there. I would like to update on the young lady I was trying to offer some help to. She seemed settled in her new supported accommodation and was working with her support team better than she had previously done. Then careless, thoughtless words from someone close to her set her right back and she again tried to take her own life. I'm at a total loss as to what to say at times. She's now on a section 3 in a mental health facility. Sadly people do still misunderstand mental health and do not know how to best help those suffering from a mental health condition. Some may not agree with me but I believe that mental health and the importance of a good mental wellbeing needs to be taught in schools at a age appropriate age. Education is the key to understanding and with better understanding comes less stigma and discrimination. Apologies for waffling on
Christine cx
108 posts