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Money and Mania - Carers UK Forum

Money and Mania

For issues specific to caring for someone with mental ill health.
Hey folks,

So myself and Una (who has bipolar with ultra ultra rapid cycling (mood swings in the space of hours)) have just had quite a difficult talk about finances. When she is in a mania, consequences don't matter and she will end up buying things she doesn't need. In the past, when she was holding down a job as well, it wasn't too big a deal. However our finances are getting tighter and now Una can't afford her own bills because of her inability to control her spending.

I work 9 to 5 including a 2 hour commute each way so doing the shopping myself is incredibly impractical. We do an online shop every week, which I do help with, but all the small things that get forgotten or fresh veg which need to be bought in-store means giving Una is also full of issues.

Does anyone here have experience or advice with this? Our only idea so far is that I just come home later and do the shopping as needed after work and the only money Una gets is the spending money I give her.
You definitely need to separate your finances so your own well being and future is not put at risk by Una. In the short term, I would suggest twice weekly shopping for absolutely everything, including fresh veg. However, in the long term, you are dealing with too much, you're going to burn yourself out, with work plus a long commute. Something is going to have to give - make sure it's not your own health.
Hi Xmakina
I work and care for my hubby and I have to do all the shopping too. You have to be very organized if you are both working and caring.
I make endless lists. I keep a list of things that are getting used up (sugar, coffee etc) in my diary, so that they dont get forgotten, and every week I make a meals menu for each day, so that I can make sure Ive got everything. I now work part time, but even when I was working full-time I would do a supermarket shop mid-week and a local shop for meat and fresh veg on Saturday. I have found that most veg will last a week in a fridge, and if it wont - eat it first! Meat can be labelled and put in the freezer. This way you may find that you only need to shop once a week. Perhaps you could do this by internet, even in your lunch hour if you have the right phone.
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