Hi everyone.
I'm new here and just need someone to talk to. I'm 40 and my husband is 43 we have 2 children living at home.
I've been with my husband for 22 years and for the first 15 years everything was great.
My hubby was in the army when we met and has witnessed some horrific things.
I noticed back then that he'd have moments of withdrawal and quietness but never put two and two together.
So things got bad in April this year, he had a complete melt down while I was at work and our two children (15 & 8 )where the ones who witnessed this.
He smacked our youngest and then told him that he (My husband not my son) shouldn't be here, and that he doesn't deserve to be a parent. I came home straight away and did what I could.
I made him an appointment the next day to see a doctor.
I attended the doctors with him and told the Dr that his behaviour was totally out of character and that he needs help.
The doctor put my hubby on medication for depression and severe anxiety, also referred him to Let's Talk and Mind.
He had 6 weeks of counselling and has since just got worse.
He doesn't like to go out, he doesn't talk on the phone (He has a mobile but never charges it) he very rarely gets dressed and has be prompted into get a bath and he doesn't eat properly either. He's so slim as it is and I worry so much.
He doesn't sleep well and this in turn causes him to sleep during the day. He will quite openly admit that he'd stay upstairs if he could.
He has practically stop socialising.
I am doing everything I can to help but I just feel he's not even meeting me halfway.
I've read numerous pages on how to help.
I know it sounds selfish but I'm getting so low and feel like we are just existing and lot living.
Our sex life is non existent and it's not through lack of trying. I understand that sex sex isn't everything.
I feel so unloved and sometimes just think I'm here because I'm so scared of what would happen If I left him. He literally couldn't cope on his own. He would spiral even further into depression.
I do love him but my love is fading more and more each day. Our children love their dad but even they are walking round on eggshells. Our eldest spends a lot if time in her room because she says that she'd rather be there than risk her dad having a go at her
I'm gutted our kids are thinking like this and I really don't know what else to do.
Should i leave? Stay? I'm at a loss and really struggling to come up with a solution.
Sorry for long winded intro xx
I'm new here and just need someone to talk to. I'm 40 and my husband is 43 we have 2 children living at home.
I've been with my husband for 22 years and for the first 15 years everything was great.
My hubby was in the army when we met and has witnessed some horrific things.
I noticed back then that he'd have moments of withdrawal and quietness but never put two and two together.
So things got bad in April this year, he had a complete melt down while I was at work and our two children (15 & 8 )where the ones who witnessed this.
He smacked our youngest and then told him that he (My husband not my son) shouldn't be here, and that he doesn't deserve to be a parent. I came home straight away and did what I could.
I made him an appointment the next day to see a doctor.
I attended the doctors with him and told the Dr that his behaviour was totally out of character and that he needs help.
The doctor put my hubby on medication for depression and severe anxiety, also referred him to Let's Talk and Mind.
He had 6 weeks of counselling and has since just got worse.
He doesn't like to go out, he doesn't talk on the phone (He has a mobile but never charges it) he very rarely gets dressed and has be prompted into get a bath and he doesn't eat properly either. He's so slim as it is and I worry so much.
He doesn't sleep well and this in turn causes him to sleep during the day. He will quite openly admit that he'd stay upstairs if he could.
He has practically stop socialising.
I am doing everything I can to help but I just feel he's not even meeting me halfway.
I've read numerous pages on how to help.
I know it sounds selfish but I'm getting so low and feel like we are just existing and lot living.
Our sex life is non existent and it's not through lack of trying. I understand that sex sex isn't everything.
I feel so unloved and sometimes just think I'm here because I'm so scared of what would happen If I left him. He literally couldn't cope on his own. He would spiral even further into depression.
I do love him but my love is fading more and more each day. Our children love their dad but even they are walking round on eggshells. Our eldest spends a lot if time in her room because she says that she'd rather be there than risk her dad having a go at her

I'm gutted our kids are thinking like this and I really don't know what else to do.
Should i leave? Stay? I'm at a loss and really struggling to come up with a solution.
Sorry for long winded intro xx