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Is this normal? - Carers UK Forum

Is this normal?

For issues specific to caring for someone with mental ill health.
My daughter suffered a 1st psychotic episode 4 weeks ago for which she was sectioned, she was allowed home a week ago on an early release with the community early intervention team doing daily visits and ongoing support. She was diagnosed with Bipolar whilst sectioned which looking back on certain behaviors and events I have a tendency to agree. She is an adult of 30 years and married with a child.

During the build up to psychosis she really was not happy with me and said some terrible things, she has apologized since and when her community mental health nurse asked who her main carer was she said me, as her husband has his own issues and she doesn't want to put more pressure on him, but she is still calling me, behind my back, even when I am there at her beck and call! This is all very new and I am trying my best to brush the calling to one side but it is very difficult and I really want to try and discuss it with her but she still hasn't made a full recovery, she is still quite manic and very irritable. When she sees the mental health nurse she acts completely different though, although she did say to me that she is still in an heightened mood and she needs to be kept in a calm environment, which is difficult as I cannot control what she does/where she goes and I know she is going here there and everywhere!

I'm not sure what the future holds and it a worry, I'm also not sure what the position of me being her primary carer entails and if I can be that, obviously I want to be there and help her as much as I can but I work full time and am a single mother of an 11 year old who has to be my 1st priority. She has upset her brother this weekend because he overheard her calling me to her friend, he can't understand why she is behaving this way, ringing me asking me to go to her, take her here and there then calling me, I have explained she isn't well and ignore it but how long will this continue?
Your daughter seems to be trying to hide her illness, acting different, that she is alright talking to the mental health nurse when as you say she is hyper and irritable.

She needs to be honest with the mental health nurses, if she is hyper still maybe the medication isn't working, or is she taking the medication?
It is very scary having a psychotic episode for both the sufferer and the family.

The right medication AND the right help and support will stabilise your daughter, reduce the highs and lows.
So your daughter needs to say, look i am still hyper to the mental health nurses , they are there to help.
Might be the wrong medication, the wrong dose or just might take more time to take effect.

I have seen it so many times, people with bipolar feel better, stop taking the medication and end up back in hospital.
Perhaps keep a diary of your daughter, day by day, pass it onto the nurses.
And by keeping a diary you can see if your daughter is getting worse or better.

There may be confidentiality issues that you are not allowed to talk to the nurses about your daughter, but they can give general advice to you, help and support.
Contact Pals as well all mental health hospitals have to have a PALS, Patient Liason for advice on how to help your daughter.

But like you say you have an 11 year who must take priority.

Your daughter has to work with the mental health team, it is very scary having mental illness, having a psychotic episode but the Nurses are there to help.

Many people with the RIGHT SUPPORT lead fairly normal lifes with mental illness and that is crucial getting the right support.
Thank you for your suggestions, I think the diary is a good idea. I am going to give her nurse a call to discuss things with her, some things cannot be said in front of my daughter!
I think our main problem at the moment is my daughter not really, fully acknowledging her Bipolar diagnosis and her thinking she is almost recovered.
She also discovered she was pregnant at the start of her psychosis and is convinced that was the cause, I was in her review of and the constant didn't appear to put a great deal of weight to that.
It's also difficult because her family and friends can see it now, we have always said she is difficult to be around for any length of time and she does often have moments where her mood suddenly changes, she becomes very highly irritable.
It is very scary, one minute you are living a normal life, the next you are in hospital diagnosed with a long term life illness.

Many people have no contact with mental illness, then suddenly to be diagnosed it may take weeks/months to come to terms with a diagnosis.
Counselling will help your daughter to come to terms with it.

You can live with Bipolar disorder, there are many celebs who have bipolar, they come out if that is the right word to show anyone can get bipolar, rich, poor, celeb, not celeb.

Pregnancy as you know can send your hormones haywire, plus bipolar makes things doubly difficult, the body coping with 2 major changes.
The mental health services and the GP then hospital will have to co ordinate services make sure your daughter is looked after with the pregnancy and bipolar.
Ideally your daughter should have a named mental health worker who can deal with any issues.

I have a lot of experience with mental illness and caring, my care role isn't really physical, i am caring for people with mental health issues.