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Carers UK Forum • I'm just trying to catch up
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I'm just trying to catch up

Posted: Sat Nov 03, 2012 10:50 pm
by joanne75
Yesterday I found out my brother's problem with me, apparently he thinks, that I think; I'm better than everyone else. If he only talked to me about it, he would find out what I feel.
I feel that everyone in my family is better than me, they don't come to see me, and they don't want to speak to me, because to them I'm useless and worthless, life was the same all through my school years, I was a loner and got called an N.F. because I had no friends. Rick is always with me now, so I'm not totally alone and I have a few friends now but none that ever comes to visit me, (apart from the odd 1 + my mum and dad) which leaves me feeling even more worthless. So in all honesty I feel like the bus has gone and left me behind, so I spend my life trying to catch up with everyone else.
Mum and Dad and Rick and Sam are the people that I have closest to me that care, and my brothers 2 boys still talk to me if they see me, but they don't come to visit.
My brother and 2 sisters don't want to know me, I have 6 nephews and 1 niece that I don't see because of this and 4 of them are 10 and under so they are to young to understand, but if they are told to stay away from me, I'll never see them again.
I understand that friends come and go; apart from the odd few that hold on, but my siblings are blood related and would rather have nothing to do with me, it makes me sad and so depressed because I'm 37 years old and will soon be past the point of being able to have children, and I'm scared that If I ever get to the age of 90 like my nan; and I haven't got any children of my own who will come and see me, I am gonna be a lonely old lady, because nobody in my family will come to see me; because I mean nothing to them, my Mum and Dad probably won't be around when and if I get to the age of 90, and there's also a chance that Rick won't be around either, in saying that I might not get to the age of 90, so I'm probably being really silly, but it helps to talk about it. Sorry for ranting, just had to get that off my chest.

Re: I'm just trying to catch up

Posted: Mon Nov 05, 2012 8:33 pm
by crocus
Hi Joanne.
Its awful when you feel like that. When you have a childhood with no friends its so easy to get into that mindset and feel that no one will ever like you. Have you tried inviting friends round for coffee or seeing if anyone wants to go shopping with you? Sometimes you have to make the first move.
Families though, thats a different kettle of fish. Image So many people have problems with their families, its not just you.

Re: I'm just trying to catch up

Posted: Mon Nov 05, 2012 8:42 pm
by rickbat
Hi Joanne.
Its awful when you feel like that. When you have a childhood with no friends its so easy to get into that mindset and feel that no one will ever like you. Have you tried inviting friends round for coffee or seeing if anyone wants to go shopping with you? Sometimes you have to make the first move.
Families though, thats a different kettle of fish. Image So many people have problems with their families, its not just you.
yes she invites friends around the problem is with us living in rural norfolk, the friends that wish to visit have no way of getting here while the ones that have their own transport cant be bothered, we usualy ferry her friends without way of transportation over for a visit.

Re: I'm just trying to catch up

Posted: Mon Nov 05, 2012 9:17 pm
by crocus
Oh dear, rickbat, I can see that in rural areas thats a problem. Its good that you can give transport.

Re: I'm just trying to catch up

Posted: Mon Nov 05, 2012 9:44 pm
by joanne75
I think maybe I need to see my GP, to see if I can get a higher dose of anti-depressants as I think this might help to make me feel not so bad about myself.

Re: I'm just trying to catch up

Posted: Wed Nov 14, 2012 12:36 am
by joanne75
I think maybe I need to see my GP, to see if I can get a higher dose of anti-depressants as I think this might help to make me feel not so bad about myself.
Went to see my GP today and I was on 30mg of Mirtazapine, The doctor raised them to 45mg, to see if it helps, while I was there I also asked to be transferred to a physiotherapist about my back. so he's done that too.