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Desperate need help - Carers UK Forum

Desperate need help

For issues specific to caring for someone with mental ill health.
Message deleted by request of poster.

Kate, Carers UK
I would like to reassure you that mental hospitals are definitely not like they show in the movies. Sometimes patients do need to be restrained and sedated, but that really is a last resort, and they are not put in straight jackets. The most likely thing is he will be put on one-to-one supervision until he is no longer deemed to be an immediate danger to himself. He will be offered different types of group and singular talking therapies and medication in a supportive environment.
Hospitals have become much more open and better at communicating with carers in recent years. If you have any questions or worries, staff are normally more than happy to talk to you on the phone.
Let us know how he gets on, and we're here for you if you need us xx
Hi

I'm finding it difficult to cope because he's refusing to see me and he an adult, their not telling me much. I still trying to piece together what happened.

I don't know if I should contact a legal person or what?

What do I do?
Hi, I know you've posted on another section here, All about caring, and I'm glad that Gavin has advised you to get in touch for Carers UK's expert advice.

I'm sorry about the horribly distressing and worrying situation you are in. It probably wouldn't be a bad idea to contact a solicitor maybe, because you will probably need to get advice on what the financial situation is (eg, can you/your husband now access bank accounts and so on.)

It must be horrible that your husband is blaming you for his state of mind, but that is his illness talking, not 'him', and he is simply targeting the closest person around, and that is you. In a way, in the olden days, when the mentally ill were so often regarded as 'possessed by demons', one can see that they had a point, seeing it that way, as it is, in a way, the 'demon' of his mental illness that is being so vicious towards you......

I hope that the private hospital you mention in the other posts, despite the rudeness of the staff (unacceptable! Especially in a private hospital for heaven's sake!) (can you go over the nurse's head and speak to a manager!), that the treatment will be good, and that your husband's condition will improve.

Kind regards, at such a difficult time for you, Jenny
Im so sorry for the problems your husband is having and the worry and distress this is causing both of you. Lots of posters here have good advice and first hand experience of a family member being assessed or treated in a psych ward or waiting for community services.

Your husband is detained on a section 2, this is an assessment order to assess whether he has a mental illness. He may be prescribed medication (called psychotropics) like antidepressants, antipsychotics or mood stabilisers but he has the right to refuse them. He may be given medication without his consent if he is in immediate danger of either harming himself or someone else. Absolutely no straight jackets are used, this is an assault.
His section will last for 28 days. He can be discharged from section before this, this doesnt necessarily mean he is being discharged from hospital. After 28 days his consultant psychiatrist will decide whether to discharge him from hospital, keep him in as a voluntary (consenting) patient, or use another section if your husband needs treatment for a mental illness but is refusing it.
Your husband can appeal against his section, but he must declare his desire to do this to staff at the hospital. He must do this in the first half of his section, so for a section two which lasts 28 days, he must tell staff within the first 14 days.

Your husband has a right to confidentiality, and staff cannot disclose any aspects of his admission without his express consent. However, you can talk to the staff about how your husband has been in the weeks leading upto his suicide attempt, and what kind of a person he is generally, also has there been any stressful events recently. This is called collateral history. You can also express your concerns to the staff.

The hospital itself is like any other hospital ward, but staff usually dont wear uniforms. It will also try to be a bit more 'homely' than other wards, ie there will be a dining room where patients are encouraged to eat and a lounge/tv room. Some wards might have a deescalation area where agitated patients can be moved away from the general ward environment to cool off or if they need to be given medication. It will probably have controlled access ie people cant just walk in off the street, but people inside can get out by pressing a switch. If it's locked on both sides, this is a psych intensive care unit, and I think all patients are detained (I think because you cant lock patients who are voluntary/not detained, as its an unlawful deprivation of liberty).

The info Ive given you is general and possibly a bit out of date so always check with the staff on the ward. Mind are also a very good source of uptodate info and support.