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DEPRESION and FATIGUE - please help! - Carers UK Forum

DEPRESION and FATIGUE - please help!

For issues specific to caring for someone with mental ill health.
As I have been posting a lot these last few days you will know I am worried about my DH who has disappeared into his 'dark pit'. He has been sleeping most of the last 4 days and nights. Usually when this happens he takes Diazepam constantly for 4 or 5 days to stop himself thinking while it 'passes'. Not sure what comments anyone has to make about that - be interesting to hear your input on his reaction though.

Anyway, at the moment and for the past 18 months or so he has been trying to find a way to feel more awake and alert and less tired. (there isnt a herbal / homeopathic remedy we havent tried!) These past few days he can hardly keep himself awake and his speach is slurred and I know he hasnt taken any Diazepam as i have hidden it! His lack of energy and constant tiredness really bothers him. He is a shell of a man.

Any ideas?
Is this usual for depression or is there more to it? If so what does he do about it?
He is tailing off his AD drug (Wellbutrin 75mg from 300 mg reduced slowly) ready to start something new (dont know what yet though!) if that is relevant.
love to all, and thanks for the comments, I know we have a lot to be thankful for.

I know your comments have suggested/insisted it should be him researching and trying to find these things out but I find it so hard to sit and watch him get worse without doing something! He really has NO motivation at all, none. I think he would stay in bed all day!
Sorry I was getting mixed up with advice I had from the depressionfallout forum - which is to make him take responsibilitie for his own illness and not get sucked in to it. But when all he can do is sit and stare at the floor I cant just leave him and not help, I just cant. The depressionfallout site says by loving someone in that way and dealing with these issues for them you are taking away their sense of responsibility. But when my Dh can not bear to see anyone let alone have a discussion about his feelings it isnt going to happen is it, unless I do it for him, then we can both get on!
I dont mean to be defensive it is just their view point, I can see what they mean but I dont agree with it. Hope that makes my comment make sense now!

It is some comfort to read about others who have siilar issues.
thanks for reply.
Thanks for that, I did see a glimmmer of recognition in his eyes earlier but the light has gone out again now for today.

The studio was a huge effort for him physically as he has herniated discs (!) and he wanted me to have somewhere to go to when he is down. We talked about it, but like you I can say or do something that tips him over without knowing it.

It would make him happy to see me happy I know, thats when he notices of course! Is the way my DH blanks me usual would you say? - I find myself a pathetic clingy person asking him what I have done sometimes - its awful - I could slap myself! I dont know why I always think it is something I have done. Although that may be becaue sometimes his deep-downs have been caused by me doing something perfectly normal , like putting his favourite cup in the dishwasher, or asking him too many questions at once. But it doesnt come out until later that it was that which tipped him over!

I registered him with a new GP today too, we were with one of those new 'super-surgerys' but it was impossible to get to see a Doctor - mad and very frustrating. So I hope this one will have a new outlook for him.

anyway my Dad has his 65th coming up so I am going to aim for a painting for him as a present - that will get me in there!!! - that is after I have emptied the junk that has been dumped in there first!!! To think I was a full-time portrait painter once...!!!

My DH is a talented Joiner and we are trying to think up something small for him to make - kind of therapy and make some money - I had an idea to make trophy cabinets for children? What do you think - he can make them, I can paint them. Does it sound like something people would buy?

Enough about me, how about your day? Are things steady for you?
Well the sun is shining this morning and DH seems much brighter - he is even up already! SO fingers crossed for a nice day! I breathe a sigh of relief, but hold my breath too!!

If you want a look at my artwork I made a website to show my work at

so have a browse......and let me now what you think!!!???

have a good day everyone xxxx
WOW! Thanks so much for those comments - that spurs me on...!!!!

I will check out your music, my DH used to write music too, he was in a band in the 80's and had the offer of a recording contract but went into a panic and didnt take it further - kind of a shame but prob best - although if he had he wouldnt have hurt his back so...
I am trying to encourage him to write more he is a great song writer, I could send you one of his CDs if you PM me your address....

suns shining...
...have a good day