Safegaurding and best interest

For issues specific to caring for someone with dementia.
Hi all,I really don't know where to turn
My dad has been deteriorating for about three years,he now has a diagnosis of Alzheimer's at the moment he's in a secure hospital to assess his needs.the problem is the dementia nurse's are asking why he's there he's not poorly enough ext.
His partner had isolated him from us( both family and friends) they've been together about eight years,she said she had been abused by former husband and she then got a flat but she came asking dad to let her live with him ,she'd get a job and help pay her way,but the fact was she got turned down for benefits esa and didn't want to look for work so went to a lonely pensioner,then she did become ill (epilepsy) and told my Dad that she'd been told she can't work and he'd have to look after her,she's been using undue pressure ever since for him to name her as beneficiary of his pensions and keeping him away from family.
Then just before Christmas my Dad came to my house ranting that my mum had stole his savings and it had been going on for year's ( their still technically married,and she's on his bank account but after 20 years my mum ain't took Jack)
Three years when dad started to forget thing's ect his partner has been replacing new furniture with newer furniture and telling my Dad her daughter's had gives it her,all her daughter's are on benefits they have been asking for large ammounts of cash from him,mobile phone contracts for their children and their benefiting from New furniture as that's where the stuff has been going.
Then this woman has been lying about how dad's behaviour has been and got him sectioned ,guessing she's wanting high rate attendance allowance,but like I said the nursing staff are not seeing anything like the type of behaviour she'd reported
She's been out spending on his debit card on the dates he's been in a secured unit and the bank has put a hold on his card,just need to take him to the bank with Id to reopen his account,he's been assesed has having no capacity but there's no POA been put in place,he been assessed has having no problems with any physical side as yet and is self caring ,even with an illeostomy,yet when at home he had bruising and black eye ,his partner said he'd fell out of bed,but no reported problems of falling from both hospitals he's stayed in,so I'm also worried about physical abuse.
Got safegaurding in place and a best interest meeting set up,but don't know what to expect,will they send my Dad home to this woman,dad seem to have a weird obsession with her and all he says is we can't kick her out she needs him!!!
Everything seems to be a bit of a mess and I don't know who to turn too so any advice would be appreciated thanks
If you are worried for possibilities of abuse, you should secretly install a hidden camera to where he is staying at so that you'll be aware and make sure that he's safe at the same time.
Hi Dawn
If I were you I would ring adult social services and say you are making a safeguarding call about your father and explain what you have explained to us. Try and remain calm and rational however angry you are feeling.
It may be a matter for the police although I guess it is tricky for them to get involved in family matters. I would definitely take it up with Social services. Can your mum also express concerns if some of it was in joint names still, could it be theft?? If so could be something the police could do.
Can you also have a quiet word with bank manager , explain dementia and safeguarding and be honest with them about what has been happening.
Do you have access to his premises, now that he's in hospital? Is that leech of a thief in the house ALL the time? If not, and you do have keys (or even if you don't - then break in!), and simply collect EVERYTHING in there that has ANY value, especially paperwork, debit/credit cards, pension book, bank statements etc etc. You are collecting it for you mum (his legal wife).

This woman is a thief and a leech at the very kindest description

The trick now is to stop her accessing any of HIS money.

I would also immediately start applying for guardianship via the Office of the Public Guardian, to stop HER doing so (since there is no PoA and he has no more capacity).

And yes, of course go to the police and the GP and the social workers.

It is just terrifying how easy it is to exploit someone with dementia. My friend's father was targeted by 'boiler room scams' and 'invested' thousands of pounds in bogus companies. He kept telling my friend that they 'must' be kosher as their brochures were so handsomely printed! The police intervened and my friend had to give evidence at the subsequent trial - but the dad never got his savings back. Ghastly.
Yes I definitely agree with you Henrietta. You should do that before anything bad happens to him.
In this sort of situation, it's vital to alert the bank and ask them to freeze the account until further notice. You may never get the money back this woman has taken, but sure as heck you can stop her getting her hands on any more!

You can contact the DWP and ask to become the Appointee for dad's benefits, paid into an account in your name, but solely for dad's money. It's a simple procedure.
bowlingbun wrote:
Thu Aug 02, 2018 7:15 am
In this sort of situation, it's vital to alert the bank and ask them to freeze the account until further notice. You may never get the money back this woman has taken, but sure as heck you can stop her getting her hands on any more!

You can contact the DWP and ask to become the Appointee for dad's benefits, paid into an account in your name, but solely for dad's money. It's a simple procedure.
Yeah great suggestion! Preventing her from getting more money is the best possible option.