Raging, agitated neighbour and my garden.

[Elizabeth_1602123]

Hi, I'm a full time carer for my Mum and I do all the gardening and diy etc as well. We have a front and back garden and spare land at the back which belongs to the railway which gets very overgrown with weeds and brambles etc. Two days ago I was clearing the bottom of the garden from weeds and then burned them off for 20 minutes or so. All this wont go into the brown bin as there is not enough room and I cant afford a private collection or a gardener etc.I didn't have a big bonfire and its perfectly legal to have the occasional one anyway.

As I returned to the house, the ndn came out and started ranting and raving, saying he was going to report me to the council, I'd done it before on purpose etc when his family were there, calling me names etc. I just waved him away and didn't engage with him.I was scared he was going to attack me or something, he was going absolutely mad.

I know the family are having problems with him as they cant get him out of the house and they are having nurses round etc. I don't know weather to say something to his wife or just leave it. Shes not that great herself and we had problems with her coming for endless support a while back which has now stopped thankfully.

So would people advise saying something or just leaving it? If he does anything like that again I'll log it with 101 for my own safety.

[bowlingbun]

I would suggest keeping your mobile phone on you and recording exactly what he says.
It might just be what is needed to resolve the situation for all concerned.
We know how difficult it can be to make authorities accept that someone's dementia/mental health is really bad.
If you get on OK with the rest of the family, maybe you could explain this to them, although you might be reluctant to get involved again, understandably.

[Elizabeth_1602123]

Thanks,If I see his daughter I will have a quiet word, shes a reasonable person.

[Blue1234]

If this person has dementia it may also be a good idea to develop a thick skin as people can be perceived as enemy number 1 and if they get fixated they won’t let it rest. I see this behaviour in my own wife, who has dementia.

[Elizabeth_1602123]

I don't know if hes been diagnosed with dementia formally, but hes having some type of mental decline. The other year he nearly got kicked off a plane in Spain after becoming agitated when it was delayed on the runway for a couple of hours. These things happen obviously but he went ballistic.

Thanks for that I'm just going to ignore him and have a word with the daughter if I see her.

[Tim_1907]

Perhaps keep a log of incidents if and when they appear, try to be discreet as in don't walk directly into his path, which is annoying I know, and report it to the police if it ever steps over the line into violent threats, violence or throwing something at you or the house. Dementia or not, you should never put up with serious threats or violence of any kind. Hoping it doesn't come to that, of course.

God bless.

[Elizabeth_1602123]

Update, I just saw his daughter coming in and I asked to have a word about her Dad, she wasn't interested and said I'm busy and hes poorly. I said I thought he was because he was going mad saying right weird things. She then said something about taking her sister? to the hospital and went in the house.
Fair enough,but if he carries on with me again then I'm going to log it with 101.

[Blue1234]

You've done your best so it's right to now think of protecting yourself.

I hope things settle. Good luck.

[Elizabeth_1602123]

Thanks, I'll just not speak to them again, for all we know he might be coming to the end of his life and his brain be deteriorating etc.