looking for more support and respite

For issues specific to autism / Asperger Syndrome.
I'm a mother of two additional needs boys 8 and 5. The 5 year old has undiagnosed HF asd and Adhd. My 8 year old has had severe eczema since birth anxiety and insomnia. I have been single for 4 years and not had any respite as no close family or friends that can take them. I rarely have sleep. I work whilst they are at school. I am in process but fighting a battle even now. Children are in middle of children in need assessment plan. Been told via local authority no money for respite. My youngest has been accepted by complex needs team. My eldest still try to get assessment by cahms. Both in receipt of dla medium rate care. Can't take boys to individual activities as I can't split myself in two. They don't get on they are together. I have long days and nights. Trying to see light at the end if the tunnel! Is anyone in same boat?
Hi Sam

Welcome to the forum. I think many of us recognise the feeling of exhaustion, and that reaching out for help seems like banging your head against a brickwall and that it is adding to your load. I know for us, it felt like the assessment process took forever, and was just irritatingly a drain on our time, without offering up any solutions. But bare with it - things do start to happen, it is just incredibly slow and frustrating that you have to fight for every little bit of intervention.

If you are really feeling like it is all getting on top of you, there is nothing wrong with taking a little time out from work, even if it is just to catch up on some sleep. When you are exhausted, everything seems much harder. Is that an option?

I really feel for you with having an insomniac child - I lived through that with my eldest son Issac, who also had severe eczema. Are you wet wrapping him (what a faff!)? When his insomnia was really bad, the GP prescribed him an anti-histamine that also made him a bit drowsy, which helped with the itching and sleep. We found Piriton was useless, but Phenergan was much better on both counts.

Battling your way through CAMHS and Children's Services is exhausting, even if you are getting a decent amount of sleep, so be kind to yourself and do not try to solve too many problems whilst keeping on top of work and running a house. Baby steps still get you there in the end, so don't be too hard on yourself. Let the housework slide, sleep when you can, and tackle things one at a time. You can and will get there, honest ;)