Hi Vimla - you may see from my post that I have experience with Aspergers. Most of the men on my fathers side of the family have it to various degrees,some also have other disorders, one is bipolar. Aspergers people can usually function well in their chosen careers but they can come a cropper if they want promotion as they are not good team players. They don't understand the concept at all. There are problems with all their interpersonal relationships and they can seem really cruel at times, but once you understand that it's not personal and they are just unable to "get it" as far as other people are concerned, you can learn to negotiate with them.
Your son has a double whammy in that he has depression as well - it does appear that Aspergers sufferers are prone to extreme anxiety, depression and paranoia. There is not a lot you can do except medicate, and show them love and support. It is hard to reason with them as they don't think like us at all.
I and the other members of my family have suffered terribly due to Dad's condition - it is only now that I understand that he is a victim of it and is unable to comprehend how his actions can effect others, that I can put my bitter feelings aside and care for him in his old age. I will not ever be able to feel love for him but I can understand him now and we cope a lot better.
You so want to help your son, but you can only do so much. He is different and will always be so. Acceptance is the better part of valour here. Get on the internet and read as much as you can, then at least you will know what you are dealing with. www.tonyattwood.com.au
is a useful site you might like to check out.