[phpBB Debug] PHP Warning: in file [ROOT]/phpbb/session.php on line 585: sizeof(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable
[phpBB Debug] PHP Warning: in file [ROOT]/phpbb/session.php on line 641: sizeof(): Parameter must be an array or an object that implements Countable
A Light Moment - Carers UK Forum

A Light Moment

For issues specific to autism / Asperger Syndrome.
I've been caring for my autistic daughter for 27 years, there's been just the two of us the last 12. I have issues which I'd like to keep private, but as a result we care for each other. Written off as a youngster, I invested a lot of time and effort in her education, but I never thought I'd have to teach urban survival skills. She's done well and I'm proud of her (and her brother, who also had developmental problems. He lives away, but we keep in touch).
I've spent much of my time walking in her shoes and we have an understanding - sort of picture-speak. She's got a lovely way of expressing herself. Today she said: "Awake I think in black and white, asleep I think in rainbows." It's been tough, especially the early years, and the years of stress and worry have taken a great toll on my own health. But odd moments like today help me to keep things in perspective.
Hello. That's is lovely expression from your daughter! I will go to bed tonight hoping for rainbows. Hope you see some too xx
What a beautiful phrase.Thank you
That's a delightful thought. Do you embroider or do cross stitch? Worth framing and putting on the wall.
Hi all and thanks for sharing, greetings Elaine - I did try cross stitch a few years ago (inspired by my master cross stitcher sister-in-law) but you've either got it or not...I'm the latter lol However, I do like calligraphy so I'll take up your lovely suggestion in that way.
I know raising and caring for ASD kin isn't easy, but I've had a few smiles along the way and I'd love to start a thread to share. Humour just lightens the load a little. So with that in mind...
A little background, as my two were growing up I encouraged them to learn and explore their world - sort of like Helen Keller's teacher where she pushed Helen's hand under the water pump and understanding came. To a degree, we all have the capacity to learn and enjoy and to feel. This happened last year...
My daughter is a bit of a boffin/geek. She's into all sorts of scientific things. Her main interest is the table of elements. This morning at 5am she popped her head around my bedroom door (I was up). "Mum, I'd like to make bismuth crystals." (I'm thinking kids chemistry set type thing).
"And how do you do that, then?" I queried.
"You get ingots of bismuth off the internet and heat them up to 500 degrees centigrade, until they're molten - I'd need a saucepan - then you ..." and launched into a scientific elucidation that flew over my head and splatted against the wall.
The word "molten" had my ears pricked.
"What's bismuth?" I asked.
"It's a metal."
Quick thinking...
"Our oven only goes up to 300 centigrade."
She looked rather downcast and mooched off to her bedroom, returning a few minutes later.
"I got it wrong, I read the wrong temperature. It's only 271.6 degrees to melt bismuth."
I had visions of a blackened kitchen and ashes of dubious things all over the floor, not to mention a rather sooty-faced daughter.
"The answer, dear one, is no. It wouldn't be safe. Ring the university and ask them if you can use the facilities there."
"That's a good idea. I never thought of that." And off she went to find her phone.
At least she asked me first!
Perfect Caroline, My calligraphy is the same level as your cross stitch so never though of it. When you've done it any chance of posting a photo?
Hi Elaine, here's progress to date. I've asked my daughter to do a small rainbow-coloured butterfly in the corner. Normally I do a border of illustrations, but I don't think this needs anything other than a butterfly. She used to call them rainbow-jiggers when she first started to whisper words, it seems a nice touch. My hands shake these days so I have to write it out in pencil first, but it's a cheap and fulfilling hobby. I use a pen I got from The Works for £2 and the cartridges are really cheap, too. The style's called chancery, and I downloaded a template last year off the internet. It took me a few hours of practice to grasp the basics. The capital letter I copied from a very old book I picked up in a dusty old secondhand shop, with my own flourish here and there ;) We also use sign language a lot (BSL) (sort of a simultaneous verbal/sign language - it deals with the problem of eye contact, she watches my hands and listens at the same time). The signs for butterfly and rainbow are beautiful. Here's the calligraphy...


It sounds like you and your daughter have a lovely understanding, Caroline.

Hi Melly1, we have some interesting conversations and it enables me to communicate ideas very quickly (and covertly, when the need arises). A nice bonus is having chats with a lovely deaf shop assistant locally.
"The sun's out, I'm going outside to get up close to a butterfly."
"A rainbow's an upside-down smile."