Having real problems with Aspergers son aged 22

For issues specific to autism / Asperger Syndrome.

We have a son who is Asperger's and he is coming up to 23 years of age. He lives at home and has shown behaviour where he has had an infatuation with another lad with Asperger's in the past when he was around 18-18 years of age. This was when he was at college and he got so attached to this lad he would not do anything without him. The staff at college tried to separate him at times from this lad as they could see the attachment was very great and they knew he would not cope very well once college had finished if they did not do this. However he left college and suffered for a long time. He would cry a lot and it took him the best part of around a year to feel any better.

My daughter has a boyfriend who is 21 and he is now living with my daughter. She has known him for two years and over the last year or so he has shown a real attachment to this young man. He is constantly texting him and wanting to meet him and unfortunately we don't get on with my daughter's boyfriend as he has been abusive physically towards our daughter on many occasions. It has been said that he may have Asperger's syndrome himself. The situation has got really bad just lately and my son is constantly texting this young man and wanting to visit him to the point where he doesn't want to eat our meals and go out and do anything with us. He is also spending a lot of time in his bedroom which he never normally does and stays up a lot at night and sleeps excessive hours in the day. He just wants to order pizzas and curry's all the time and yet he has always eaten our meals we cook for him. He has also taken to stealing money from my purse when he already has enough money of his own. We hate living like this and want our old son back. He is just a closed book. We can't get him to see the Social Worker as he never comes down the stairs or attends her appointments. He has given up his daytime activities he receives a personal budget for. Has anyone else had similar problems to us as we feel we can't carry on living like this as it is making us feel very unhappy?
Hi Sorry for all the problems you are having. I did a google seach and found this...
http://livingwithaspergerssyndrome.weeb ... hment.html
One paragraph..

Due to repeating the same process with people I decided to look at my relationships closely to try and identify what patterns kept re-occurring. Probably the biggest mistake I would make was to over exert myself in an attempt to please people. This would be fine for a while but it would get to the point where I could no longer keep it up as I would be drained. This would lead to me pulling away for my space as I’ve mentioned before. This simplest way to avoid pushing myself too far has been to simply let me people know what to expect of me. It may seem rather matter of fact to do something like that but it lets people know where they stand, and lets them decide if they’re happy with how things will be.

Intresting, reading
I have PMd you Samantha.