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Urgh!!! help - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Urgh!!! help

Socialise and chat about other areas of your life
bowlingbun wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 11:12 am
Unfortunately, health and social services don't talk to each other!!
In effect, you are now "parenting" your mum.
YOU are now in charge, because without you, mum wouldn't be able to manage in her own home without your support.
Help may be available from other places, but it depends on the answers to a few questions first.

How old is mum?
Is mum claiming Attendance Allowance? (Not means tested)
If mum is getting support from a memory clinic, has anyone told you that people with memory problems, dementia etc. are EXEMPT from Council Tax, from the day of diagnosis/referral?
Does she have any other health issues?

Does mum have over £23,000 in savings? (Yes/No)
Do you have Power of Attorney?
Does mum own or rent her home?

Yes BowlingBun you are right, and she even saids it herself if it wasn't for me she wouldn't be able to manage.
  • My mother is 90 years old now, as I keep telling her

    :?: I think you told me this before, maybe when the doctor from the memory clinic calls up I should say to him or wouldn't they even know?

    We thankfully get Attendance Allowance, but it is the Lower rate as she doesn't need much help, and doesn't have any other health problems other then her mobility problem, as she broke her hip in 2016, but now she really can see to herself she does her own lunch, she can even do her own dinner although I like to cook her something, when I go out, so all she has to do it warm it up in the Microwave. I'm only really here for support, and do exciting stuff like shopping, housework, look after the finances and take her out in the Wheelchair, oh and make sure she takes her medication according to the instructions, like CoCodomol when you have to leave a 4 hour gap.

    She hasn't really got savings of over £23,000, but the joint account which is mainly for Direct Debits and she has her pension go into and similar finances is over £23,000, but that fluctuates, as when I get my salary I'm always transferring money owed between accounts
I don't really need Power of Attorney, as I made sure everything is in Joint names even the Tenancy, so if anything happens I'm ok that way. On an earlier post you advised me to make sure I will be ok in this housing association house, so I'm glad I confirmed that by emailing them and kept the email, thank you x

Samantha
Great that you have a JOINT account with mum, as that means that only half of it is considered to be mum's! My mum and I had one too, after she kept losing her pass book. Social Services didn't like the fact that it was joint, but there wasn't a thing they could do about it!!!
I think it's time you reviewed the Attendance Allowance situation, especially if your role is that of "looking over" her, being alert at night in case she needs you?
Good too that the tenancy can be transferred to you when the time comes, that's a huge relief.
bowlingbun wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 8:10 pm
Great that you have a JOINT account with mum, as that means that only half of it is considered to be mum's! My mum and I had one too, after she kept losing her pass book. Social Services didn't like the fact that it was joint, but there wasn't a thing they could do about it!!!
I think it's time you reviewed the Attendance Allowance situation, especially if your role is that of "looking over" her, being alert at night in case she needs you?
Good too that the tenancy can be transferred to you when the time comes, that's a huge relief.
Why doesn't the Social Services like it that you have a joint account, makes it easier for you later on?

Yes I think I will review it, I suppose I need to get in touch with them, but I wonder the doctor who phones up from the memory unit, by what I tell him as nobody comes down as I think they don't want to in the current climate, anyway I digress he has said it sounds like she has an underlying Dementia problem, which they prob can give some medication for but they don't want to give her anything because she had a head injury which resulted in a Brian Hematoma, but I wonder BowlingBun will this contribute to AA, I mean the Dementia problem?
If mum had an account in her own name with £24,000 in it, that would all count as mum's.
If it's a joint account, then only £12,000 counts as mum's.
It's the difference between getting a lot of care funded by SSD, and getting no care funded!!

When mum dies, then it all becomes yours automatically, without any need for probate etc.
bowlingbun wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:43 pm
If mum had an account in her own name with £24,000 in it, that would all count as mum's.
If it's a joint account, then only £12,000 counts as mum's.
It's the difference between getting a lot of care funded by SSD, and getting no care funded!!

When mum dies, then it all becomes yours automatically, without any need for probate etc.
Thanks for that BowlingBun, yes I see how they wouldn't like that.

Samantha