The Casual Banter Thread

[Sajehar]

Oh Pooh! I've got one of those newfangled moulded keypads that can't collect breadcrumbs. I feel deprived.
I'm going to complain to Toshiba that they've denied me the culinary pleasures of keyboard crumb bread & butter pudding, and microwaved softened breadcrumbs. I want breadcrumb compensation off them! Maybe they'll send me a loaf of Mother's Pride?

[Koala]

A crumbled loaf perhaps.

[no1mum]

Add a few currants for flavour.

[harryh31]

Watch out MasterChef....... here we come

[Sajehar]

Harryh31

You've given me an idea. Enter the computer crumble for Master Chef.

Ingredients:

12 ounces (showing my age now) of computer crumbs
6 ounces of belly button fluff
4 ounces of raisins
2 ounces of butter
About 30 scabs

For jus, a handful of pennies retrieved from back of sofa.

Preheat microwave to whatever it's top setting is for ten minutes.
In the meantime beat all ingredients together until they form a smoothish paste. Next spoon one third of mix into a greased dish.
Place ten scabs on top. Repeat until all mix and scabs are used.
Assuming microwave hasn't blown up with nothing in it in the meantime, nuke for 3 minutes.

Somehow melt copper coins, and drizzle artfully around your computer crumble.

I think it's a winner, and SOOOooo 21st century.

[Tilly Brice]

Hahahahahahaha!!!


Even though I am laughing - a part of me is saying eww!!

Tilly

[Myrtle]

You forgot the dog/cat hairs!

[Sajehar]

I knew the artiste in me was missing something.... Durr!

For those of you who are dog/cat challenged, a good substitute is those mangled/ welded together human hair clumps one pulls out of plug holes. Remember to thoroughly rinse first, and to finely chop BEFORE adding to mix.

[Jaxt4960]

Just come onto this thread, laughing out loud & would love to use your useful tips. Help me what do I do, go hungry? I use a tablet so no keyboard to catch crumbs for any kind of anything, any advice welcome
Do have lots of eggs from hens?

[Koala]

Have a search around the shops, Chickenlady. Someone's bound to make a fake keyboard cover for tablets, specially designed to catch crumbs, dog fur, and other assorted goodies.