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Positives About You! - Carers UK Forum

Positives About You!

Socialise and chat about other areas of your life
Hi
According to one of my home treatment team it's good to say some positives about yourself every day, 2-3 things if possible. I'm struggling with 1 at the moment. My family have said a few but you know what family are like they don't want to hurt your feelings so they tell you what you want to hear. I've had a pen and paper in front of me for ages but so far not been able to put anything on it.

Can you say any positives about yourself?
Top of what my family would say about me today?
I cook great fruit cake, marzipan (on the Easter cake) and hot cross buns and Easter nests.
I'm really good at darning overalls way past their best.
I'm good at spelling.
I'm the best cook ever to have taught my grandson. (Not much competition!)

My own list about me, with regard to my family, would be very different.
I try hard never to lose my temper.
I love my family above all else and will do anything possible to help and support them.
I love dressmaking - but HATE mending anything, especially worn out overalls.

The "best" me?
Loves travelling, packing, lists, Kipling handbags, finding flights, hotels, places to go etc. etc.

The "worst" me?
My Butterfly Brain can flit from one thing to another, but when really concentrating can work wonders.
My Scatty Brain can lose car keys in an instant. I have 2 sets, if both sets make it to our key tray the "boys" will make stupid comments like "Goodness, that's a miracle, both sets together!"
I'm very good at empathizing. I always put myself in others' shoes with just about anything so that I can understand their possible perspective. I work in a school now and it's a very handy trait to have. But it's also a bit of a pain, whenever I read stories about people/animals dying or something I can't stand to think about the suffering they may have gone through. I find it very upsetting.
Carol, I know what you mean. Definitely a double edged attribute.
If you work in a school, I'm sure you have LOTS of attributes, being kind, organised, gentle, supportive, encouraging?
I'm very sensitive too other people's needs and feelings. Find it hard to put myself first.Thats not always a positive!
Apparently I'm the best nanny anyone could wish for. Often it's said nanny to the rescue again.
The one thing I can say is since my husband died I have coped with things that I never thought would be able to. Family and the lovely people on the forum tell me to look at all I have achieved which when listed I can see.
Am a true friend and not one to turn away when they are having a bad time. Discovered my own true friends when my life was in turmoil. Many so called friends backed away
Carol you sound as if you have a great deal of empathy and that is a wonderful skill to have as it makes you a caring compassionate person and a great friend. But yes, trying to think of positive things about me is not easy and I think many of us struggle to acknowledge the good in ourselves and are therefore much too hard on ourselves.

Well I guess I am a good cat mother - caring and able to pick up things quickly when they go downhill. Able to pill and administer drops when needed and I will always go the extra mile for my beloved pets. They say at the Book Club that I am very organised and good at running meetings but that may be partially because no one else wants to be Chairman. I love people and enjoy getting involved in my social group and chairing events as and when I can. I think I have some empathy as try never to judge.

Bad things? Patience and I were seperated at birth! I also do not tolerate fools lightly.
I am told I am a good listener. People always say I am very approachable and friendly. I went with a friend on a watercolour painting day once and after a few hours the tutor kept singling me out and chatting away to me. my friend asked me how long we had known each other and I said “since we got here this morning,” 🤣. On holiday people just start talking to me and my husband says “here we go again.” I even had a lady in a supermarket queue tell me she had just had a phonecall to say her son had committed suicide. I had never seen here before. I didn’t help her much but I listened to her, that was all I could do.

I am very loyal to family and friends and will always fight their corner if needed.

I like helping people and knit things for new babies in the village and have cooked food for people when they have had bad news or a problem. I think that is probably from my upbringing because my Mum did all that too.

I am sure I have lots of faults too though. 🤭
I'm able to take care of the things that need to be done in my life, from the simple to the complex. There isn’t anything I can’t conquer.
I'm a good listener and friend.
I know that each step I am taking is moving me right where I want to be. I’m not stuck in a rut at all! In fact, I am making great progress into my future plans.
I know that I don’t need other people’s approval or compliments to make me feel like I am doing the right thing or am headed in the right direction.
Your positives could be as simple as you smiled today or made someone smile. It's just starting that way of thinking about yourself and even if it is just one thing, it will start becoming a positive to do and you will find it easier and find a second one. It's easy to get bogged down and lost in the daily grind, but to take time out to think of good things about yourself, positives, it is a treat to yourself to remind you of those good things about you.

If you are struggling think about things to be grateful for eg you have a home, you are in a free country and have democracy and the vote and freedom as a female. The sun shone.

It is pouring down here and I am delighted the garden is being watered for me, my car is getting washed and deep joy of joys I can get on with some indoor jobs, ugh!

When I do these I try to look beyond the caring aspect because that is a given and I want to look outside of it to take my mind away from it and see more to the positives than just the caring.

3 positives of Wednesday
Warm and sunny today
We are well and healthy
We have freedom in a democratic country

3 Positives of yesterday, last night
My mother woke up (as opposed to not waking up)
Fresh salad veg from the garden on the dinner plate
I finished a big hard work job in the garden

3 positives of today
A surprise visit from someone
The rain is watering the garden and washing the car
We are well and healthy today - this will be replaced with a takeaway tea - no cooking, if it isn't raining!

3 positives about me Wednesday
I didn't procrastinate over a horrid task
I gave someone a smile
My green/hazel eyes

3 positives about me yesterday
I did an act of kindness to someone
Wicked sense of humour
I can drive

3 Positives about me today
Independent
I smiled at the rain
Positive outlook
Breezey
Thank you for simplifying positives. Helps
So my positives today.
I've sorted my ottoman with the purpose if finding my sister's mother in law some bedding. Seems will be going home to a hospital bed and sis doesn't think her bedding is in good repair. Able to donate including a couple of pretty things. Sis is so pleased. I don't want a pat on the back, however reading your post gave me permission to feel positive about it. Beside, ottoman is sorted now,,my own bed linen changes and suddenly the sun has arrived! Been a grey morning with rain. Pottering in and out of rooms feeling grateful I have managed to chip away at things that were neglected when hubby was ill. Still some things to do but have managed so far.