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Carers UK Forum • OPA... Other People's Attitude - Page 4
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Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 6:02 pm
by Lazydaisy
Nilla, when B.was rushed unconscious into hospital two years ago, he regained consciousness in A and E,and started crying as he realised he was in the same place his brother died. The nurse asked was he alright and I explained the reason he was upset."Oh, bless,they are just so loving,aren't they?" Grrrrrrrrrrrr! He is very loving,but at that time he was a very sad and frightened young man, who needed support,and as a matter of fact so did I.
People with Downs Syndrome have very different abilities and very different temperaments. My son is a very determined person, it stood him in good stead when he was growing up, that wasn't the Downs Syndrome that is the same stubbornness that my husband has.
Did you see that I wrote the same as you about God giving only to those who can cope?

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 6:28 pm
by Nilla
I did LazyD and I don't like people saying that like you don't.
Sarah is very stubborn and that's from her Dad, she lacks confidence and isn't very loving at all, if I say I don't feel well she says 'Your alright' and walks off lol

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 8:02 pm
by Sajehar
Tiesta, feast you peepers on these little devils!

Image

Image

Your minions dance in thine honour

Image Image Image Image Image

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 8:18 pm
by Tristesa
Excellent devils! Thanks, Sajehar! Image
Tristesa

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 8:20 pm
by Sajehar
Tristesa, I've now written your name down and added it to my dictionary... no excuses now for spelling it wrong!

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 8:48 pm
by Tristesa
No worries, Sajehar! I have had a bit of trouble with yours...
My nickname is simply the Catalan word for 'sadness'. I could have chosen the German 'Traurigkeit' or the Welsh 'tristwch', or even the French 'tristesse', but Catalan is a lovely language, and 'tristesa' looks more like a personal name than any of the others. Image

Tristesa

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Mon Sep 30, 2013 11:20 am
by Sajehar
HI Tristesa, that’s so sad, quite literally. But, you’re right, it does sound like a name. I don’t blame you for giving the German or French one’s a miss – too severe, too boring, respectively – but I’d have been seriously tempted by the welsh one, though.
I have a soft spot for the Welsh language, even though I can’t pronounce it to save my life. I once embarrassed the hell out of myself by pronouncing a town as Dollygaloo, instead of Doll geth li; in front of my Welsh boyfriend and his mates, in Wales to boot. Ouch!

I went round to SF’s house Saturday evening, and showed her my post, quaking in my boots (I decided not to lie about my dongle running out; get it over and done with!) But she loved it. Phew!

With one correction: her neighbour didn’t say to put her mum down. He said put her in a home. That’s far less nasty, but even more absurd. After all, he was accusing her of not doing this in order that she could claim benefits, but putting her mum in a home would cost the tax payer even more!!!

We decided to forget all about him, and when I said it was my dad’s birthday do tomorrow, her mum insisted that SF trimmed my hair. This wasn’t quite what I’d had in mind, but we agreed just to shut her up; her mum was really insistent. It was looking a bit straggly, so I thought, “What have I got to lose.” Surprisingly, SF did a really good job. It looks much better and thicker than before, so maybe her mum was right.
After her mum went to bed, we watched videos – showing my age there, DVD’s – and I ended up crashing the night. Here’s where my ignorance of Alzheimer’s showed.
I was more than happy to sleep on the sofa bed in the living room, but SF insisted I slept in her room. I insisted otherwise. This went on back and forth for ages. In the end, she came out with it, “Look, if mum gets up before us and find’s a stranger sleeping in the living room she’ll freak out.”

That never even entered my head, even though I know if I were to introduce my mum to an old friend, she’d have forgotten about their existence by the next day. And if she were to come across them in the living room in the wee hours of the morning, she’d probably have another stroke, or attack the unsuspecting stopover with one of her walking sticks (which she never uses… Grrr!)
So, in order to prevent potential heart attacks/manslaughter, I slept in her bedroom, and poor old SF had to kip on the sofa bed. Must remember to bring enough dosh with me next time for a taxi.

Such a silly little thing, but so telling…. I’m learning, slowly but surely.

P.S. If you haven’t done so already check out ‘Hate letter to Mother of Autistic Boy’ under
‘Autism/Asperger syndrome’ section under ‘Specific Disabilities and conditions.’
It’s an extreme example of what this thread is discussing, but it seriously gave me a case of the creeps. Scary stuff.

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Mon Sep 30, 2013 5:58 pm
by JohnT
My wife is disabled and in a wheelchair and owing to a stroke at some stage she sometimes finds it difficult to make herself understood.Speech is slurred from time to time though sometimes she can speak perfectly well. and when we go in a shop etc the shop assistant decides to talk to me even before shes attempted to say what she wants.I always say to her tell the lady what you want.Sometimes i think we need a sign round my wifes necking saying my legs are not working but my brain and mouth work fine.I wonder why it is that other people see a wheelchair person and automatically think they are incapable of saying what they want.

Re: OPA... Other People's Attitude

Posted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 3:26 pm
by ellcee
On the whole, I have not had too many bad attitudes to my son - most people have been kind and helpful. However, thinking back, there was one that upset me. I had my son with me and was minding my own business, waiting for my younger daughter to come out of her gym club, when one of the other mums proceeded to tell me that my son's disabilities were all his own fault as they were due to all the bad things he had done in a previous life. I couldn't just walk away as I was waiting for my daughter, but this lady was very persistent. If that was her view, then so be it, but why did she feel the need to tell me all about it?