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A sparkly drop of hope. - Carers UK Forum

A sparkly drop of hope.

Socialise and chat about other areas of your life
I'm sorry to say that I've neglected you all after the great advice I received late 2013 early 2014. That said the advice I was given made me realize when things got really bad I had somewhere to turn to.

After the drama coming into 2014 and a gloomy outlook looking forward I'm pleased to say it was a great ishh year.

I secured my new job and got my mum sorta back on her feet although still work to be done.

So after a very very very long Christmas break 24/7 occupation by mother dearest from the 22nd of December through to 6th Jan I'm pleased to say I survived and 2015 is looking forward...... I think.......

I've just completed my first week back at work and I've had the last 3 evenings completely free of all company and I've done nothing......nada.... zip........ somebody pinch me??

So after the self imposed single dom as of 3rd of Jan (great guy just too much nice and wanted to help me) perfect I hear you all say!!!! I found the entire relationship self destructive. When I have my own self esteem issues and doubts his became too much for me to deal with aswell.

So 2015 how did that happen??

3 empty undisturbed evenings, a night out tomorrow and I'm managing to say no. 2 work nights out planned and diet ( sorry healthy eating ) and stopping the fags Monday. (Had to eat the Christmas leftovers first )

Yet here I am down, lost and with no purpose or direction and been close to tears for the last 48 hours. I have me time and I don't even know what to do with it................ :-???
Caring takes over our lives, and sort of becomes an 'exo-skeleton'....so much so that when we are 'off' caring, our 'exo-skeletons' are gone, and we 'collapse' like a jellyfish.

It can take us a while to 'remember' our own lives....

Kind regards, Jenny.....
Hi jenny, your words more than hit home. I figured if I cried and just got or over it would help but now they won't stop. It all seems so hopeless even when I look back and see how much I've managed to achieve.
Sorry all. This wasn't meant to dissolve into mush. Was meant to be a light hearted look back and forwards to the new year.
Just let the tears flow for a few days, then how about taking a short break? I did this a few weeks after my husband died, not a holiday as such, but just time to get away from home and routine things, meander around, do nothing, and allow your innermost thoughts to rise gently to the surface. I made a list of things I really wanted to do in the future. Slowly but surely, I've done most of them. I've learned how to fit invisible zips, I've been on holiday to Crete on my own, twice. Two more trips this year. I've accepted that I'm not the same person that I used to be, but 8 years later in some ways I'm more "me" than I've been in a long time! Especially when I'm sewing. Whenever there's a life changing moment, what comes next isn't immediately obvious. For the time being, allow yourself to drift aimlessly and allow yourself some "me" treats, and look around to see what you really want to do from now on. Mine are having a home beautician to give me various treatments, and having my hair cut and coloured regularly. I often surprise people when I say I'm 62, they think I'm at least 10 years younger. Sometimes I'm even thought to be my son's sister, not mother, which does my self esteem a power of good!