I have the most ace pressie lined up.... but I'm not saying anything.
David C, just for you (assuming the mods don’t remove it.)
https://kittysjones.wordpress.com/2016/ ... /#comments
I should really talk about my creative writing class. I managed to spark off one hell of a discussion about death. We were supposed to ‘Flash write’ about horoscopes. I finished mine so quickly the tutor said I could go for a fag break.
Me: Never say no to a fag break!
So I went off for one. But not nearly as much as I went off on the horoscope stuff. When it was my turn to read out what I’d written, I managed to shock the entire class into silence, then up roar.
Me: I didn’t write a short story. I wrote about me and mum….
Tutor: That wasn’t what I was expecting. Very raw. Brilliant writing, by the way.
Then the class exploded with everyone telling stories about death. Some were excruciatingly sad, others dead funny (the sort you shouldn’t laugh at, but do anyway.) The tutor just left us to get on with it; it took up about half the lesson!
Once the death stuff had worn its way out, we then had to do more flash writing. I must admit, terrifying though it is, I really like flash writing.
According to my tutor, I’m a script writer, rather than a novelist (I don’t want to be either, actually.)
My short story reminded him of Betty Davis.
Me: Who the hell is Betty Davis?
Nobody knew, until someone piped up, “Didn’t she get her legs insured for a million pounds?”
Out came the mobiles, tapping away like mad.
“Nope.. it was Betty Grable who insured her legs. Betty Davis insured her nose.”
That cleared that up then. I have/had heard of Betty Grable from my mum, but not Betty Davis. She sounds a bit of a cow, to be honest.
And she goes on about eating apple seeds; my fave bit of an apple. We have that in common, if nothing else. And then I remembered a discussion/argument I’d had with SM regarding apples.
SM: You’re seriously not eating the apple pips… they contain arsenic.
Me: Best bit of the apple; they taste just like marzipan… delish! I’ve been eating them for 50 years… try one?
He wouldn’t though. So my attempt at being ‘Eve’ failed. Still, all the more apple pips for me.
I’d still like to see that film though, just out of curiosity.