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Carers UK Forum • Bad joke marathon - Page 6
Page 6 of 6

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Mon Jul 20, 2015 2:20 am
by Simon_1501
Q: Why have scientists started using lawyers for experiments instead of rats?
A: They don't become so attached to the lawyers :D

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Fri Aug 28, 2015 7:16 pm
by Robert_15081234
Why have the elephants got big ears because noddy won't pay the ransom

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Fri Aug 28, 2015 11:13 pm
by Honey Badger
Q: How many eggs does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None, eggs don't have hands

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Mon Sep 07, 2015 10:49 pm
by Simon_1501
What kind of pictures do turtles take?
Shellfies!

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2018 2:31 pm
by David_180312
19 and 20 had a fight, 21.

I don't know why we don't send more astronauts to the moon.
It's not exactly rocket science is it??

I was talking with my wife the other night, and we decided that we only want one child.
The twins overheard and are now worried!

I went home early one day and my wife was in bed. I heard a noise in the wardrobe and opened the door.
Inside was a naked man!
I asked her what was going on, she said:
You remember when you lost your job and couldn't pay the mortgage? Well this man gave me the money to pay it.
You remember when the car broke down and I said I had won a brand new one in a competition? Well this man
bought us that car.
You remember when you wanted to go for a cruise on your birthday and I said I won one in a competition? Well
this man paid for it.
I looked at him shivering in the wardrobe, looked at her and said....
















Don't just lie there, give him a blanket to warm him up.

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Wed Apr 11, 2018 12:02 pm
by Anil_1804
Haha...good thread. Guys having fun..

Re: Bad joke marathon

Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 8:41 am
by Ayjay
The mother in law came for lunch on Sunday and while sitting at the table she moaned, "Why is the dog sitting here on the floor staring at me?"

I replied, "you're using his plate".

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I've just accidentally swallowed some scrabble tiles.

My next poo could spell disaster.

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Two good ol' boys in an Alabama trailer park were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer after getting off work at the local factory. After a while the first guy says to the second, "If'n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday and make love to your wife while you was off huntin' and she got pregnant and had a baby, would that make us kin?"

The second guy crooked his head sideways for a minute, scratched his head and squinted his eyes thinking real hard about the question. Finally, he says, "Well, I don't know about kin, but it would make us even.

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It's been reported that the man who invented Spellcheck has died. News is, the funfair's on Sundial.

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