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Bad joke marathon - Page 4 - Carers UK Forum

Bad joke marathon

Please feel free to join in or start any games.
Where do snowmen go to dance?

A Snowball
What did the bowler hat say to the bra?

You go on ahead and i will give these two a lift
a hypercondriac goes to the doctor .
h ,doctor iam ill
d ,go away you are a h
h ,just because i am a h

that doesn't mean i don't get sick sometimes Image
What kind of sandals do frogs wear?

Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?
He had no Body to go with.
A bloke goes into a pet shop wanting a parrot...The pet shop owner tells the bloke we only have one but it swears...The bloke says "I will have it, it will be novel"...bloke gets it home and after about 3 days he gets fed up with all the swearing coming from the parrot and tells the parrot, "if you don't shut up swearing i will put you in the freezer as punishment for 10 minutes"...the parrot carries on swearing, the bloke puts it in the freezer....After ten mins went back took the shivering parrot out of the freezer and asked the parrot "had it learned its the lesson?" The parrot replied "yes "...A bit later on the parrot piped up "can I ask you a question?"...the bloke said "yes anything"...the parrot asked "what did the chicken do?"
how do you keep an idiot in suspense?..........................????

(I'll tell you later)
I went to see the Dr, every day last week. At the last consultation, he said, Jimbo, I have examined you every day this week and can't find anything wrong with you despite of all the symptoms you say you have, I think you are suffering from hypochondria.

Oh no! Not that as well ? I said Image Image Image
How do you get a baby astronaut to sleep? ………………………………Rocket
Like Jimbo, I had cause to visit my GP this week....

Dr: Tell me what seems to be the problem.
Me: Well Doctor, I'm think my hearing is starting to fail.
Dr: What are the symptoms?
Me: They're a yellow cartoon family that live in Springfield, what's that got to do with my hearing?
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Philippe Flop

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

What’s ET short for? Cos he’s only got little legs!