Wow! Just read your last post after I'd written the above. Fantastic! Well done. STICK TO YOUR GUNS. I know I'm sounding very heartless about your MIL, but she has a LOT of 'growing up' to do, even at this time of her life. I don't know enough about narcissism as a personality disorder to know if it...
Hmm, the description 'narcissist' comes instantly to mind..... I have no patience with her at all I'm afraid. She needs to take a look at the lives the majority of the human race have to live, and then THANK HEAVEN she isn't anywhere near that level of misery and suffering! She deserves no considera...
Great practical advice from everyone. I especially like the 'playing your own ill health' card via 'The doctor tells me I can't.....' etc. Brilliant. Look, I'm going to be blunt again. You're trying to please her. You're trying to make her happy. Hoping desperately that FINALLY you can just GET HER ...
Crisis time. Definitely crisis time. Not so much 'tough love' as TOUGH TALK. Forget the love aspect...... I'm probably going to recommend something that is illegal, but please take her credit cards off her! She's dangerous to herself, and desperately dangerous to you and your partner! I'd say it's t...
OK, I'll be blunt - she can't go home again. It's out of the question. So she either stays where she is, or you find another home (she will find fault with that too I suspect.) What she 'really' wants is to be well and young again....and unwidowed.... Has she always been someone who liked to 'find f...
Quick reply - I'd say it's time for your MIL to move into sheltered accommodation. Your partner sells the house, the two of you buy a small place with his half, and the sheltered accommodation flat for his mum with her half. I can see the real problem is her chronic insecurity, which makes her over-...
Oh, Lord, that's a LOT of caring you have to do.....perhaps best to keep a distance from your SIL's Mother's problems! I know it can sound harsh, but heavy drinkers usually can't be (easily) helped.....
Chris hi - welcome to the forum. There are quite a few members here who are caring for an elderly spouse, or one with considerable care needs (or both). Do take a look at the Members Section. It is both wearing and frustrating, as well as generally sad, when the affected person is your life partner....
Hmm, time for a rethink methinks! OK, so your partner owns 50% of the house, and cares full time for his mother (what are her care needs?). You, meantime, work full time to 'keep' you both (and his mother?). What exactly does your salary pay for (eg, council tax on the property, utility bills, mortg...
Better to leave one's possessions to charity, rather than the experience Juggler describes.

Very very sad all round.