<t>I've had major surgery too many times. It's all very well being brave before the operation, but after the operation all I want to do is eat and sleep, I'm always totally exhausted, don't want to eat proper food, just nibbly bits when I feel like it - and this started when I was just 33 (now 60)! ...
<t>I found streamlining my home really helpful. Dishwasher, washer dryer, clothes that don't need ironing collectively make a huge difference. Don't forget to have a benefits check, if you haven't had one already (Carers UK main site has details). As your husband has mobility problems he might be el...
<t>Hi Ceri,<br/> Was your mum dad's carer? Did they "muddle along" without help, or were dad's problems recognised long ago? It sounds to me as if your workload is just impossible, something needs to give. It seems as if dad has been "the last straw" so to speak. However much we want to help, there ...
<t>Hi Jenny,<br/> I amazed that you are still standing, your workload is impossible, your loyalty to your brother shines through, but you need far more help to deal with him at the moment, and there need to be serious discussions about the future of everyone, you, your brother, and his children. You...
<t>I had to streamline my house as much as possible after an accident, now after 2 knee replacements I'm fighting fit again. I just wish I'd done it years ago. A washer/dryer - dirty things in, clean dry and ready to wear out. A dishwasher is invaluable. Choosing everyday clothes carefully. I used t...
<t>YOU should have an advocate too! My Social Services wanted me to go to some meetings. I knew it would be hostile. I asked for an advocate. Told I couldn't have one. I then refused to go without one, lo and behold, one was arranged very quickly from the Princess Royal Trust for Carers! Luckily, th...
<t>Hi Cher,<br/> I think everyone here knows how tough life as a carer can be, especially when you are tired and in need of a bit of "normal" life. That's why we like to support each other. You don't say much about whether your caree has any sort of life of her own? Is she housebound and fed up too?...
<t>Hi Holly,<br/> Welcome to the forum. You have a lot on your plate at the moment, and certainly need some help. Sometimes Social Services seem to think that if you are intelligent and can speak up for yourself you don't need much help. That's not going to get the dishes or washing done any quicker...
<t>Rather than answer the car question, perhaps I can suggest that first of all you have a benefits check, and so does mum. If it is possible to maximise both your incomes, then you might be able to fund a little car between you. It is so easy, when you drift into being a carer, as you have, that yo...
I always felt guilty if I said "No" to mum, but now I know that I need to look after my own health too, as it's not very good. As the elderly grow older, so do their children. Our parents still think of us a being much younger, fitter, stronger etc. than we actually are!