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Carers UK Forum - Search
Well, things are moving which is good. Being firm with my opinion helped apparently. My OH called a local private carer to get some information. A meeting with MIL's family solicitor is also on the way. But one thing baffled me when my dear husband said he may pay for MIL's care with our savings and...
Probably. He is Not used to asking for help and expressing his needs. We have different opinions about what is fair share of caring duties. I would probably be able to take one more night with MIL but that will only preserve the status quo which is: no help from outside the family. Kids coping well ...
After my first night with MIL. Quite good. Looks like her main obstacle to get to bed safely is sore arm. She doesn’t want an x-raty though. Signs of dementia? Yesterday she remembered my name, today she asked who my husband is and where I live. The worst: my husband asked if I can do Fri/Sat as wel...
Thank you for your replies. They are very informative.
BTW, MIL now has second thoughts and she says she will need support at night until she recovers from injuries after her fall. What a rollercoaster!
To bowlingbun: He gave up his job for various reasons. I don't feel like I need to work too much so everything is ok here. As far as I know, MIL's Attendance Allowance is used as financial support for us. But obviously, if we were fully paid carers, we would earn much more. We are happy to help with...
That's what I'm saying to my husband: tell MIL straight away that she needs to manage on her own one night per week. End of story. But now I'm worried he would give in again. I don't want to be in his shoes, honestly. My husband decided to quit his job to look after MIL, but that was not the only re...
Thank you for your question Melly1. You know, it looks like MIL thinks it is her right to receive care from us, and on her terms! I'm trying to explain OH: no, on our terms first of all because we have our needs. She needs overnight care because of her recent chest infection and a fall. IMO, it is f...
Thank you. We are all Polish, but OH was born in England and culturally English, MIL in the UK for half-century, speaks English. But yes, in Polish culture there is the tradition of children caring for their parents and sacrificing a lot for them. But the elderly there used to live in big houses wit...
So, I lost it tonight. My husband told MIL that he would come to stay overnight at 9pm. I wanted him to stay with me and the kids for as long as possible. I suggested leaving MIL something to eat by her bed in case she gets hungry. She said: "no, I won't get hungry". My husband did not leave her any...
Thank you, that is very useful. I need to discuss it with my husband again. You know, MIL is so suspicious that I want to hurt her, rob her that I'm trying to stay away from POA issue.