For my Mum, the probate office told me to enter the "resale value" of household goods and personal possessions, not what it would cost to replace them. A dealer offered me £320 to clear the house, which we accepted because it saved us a lot of hassle. We entered that amount on the form. Her total es...

Roy, have you spoken to your Mums GP? If she is older generation, she might listen to the doctor's advice even when she doesn't listen to you. Make an appointment at Mums surgery in Mums name, so the GP will have her records on the computer in front of him, and go instead of her. Then you could go b...

A support worker came to see him "for a chat", talked about this and that, and got round to talking about respite care. She was very diplomatic about it and and he perked up about going. I'm still on tenterhooks but it looks more positive. I think Jenny hit the nail on the head. He doesn't see me as...

We have a keysafe to let carers and nurses in. I thought about getting a live-in carer for a week but how could I be sure he wouldnt send her away or be so unpleasant she wouldnt stay.

My husband has early dementia. He agreed to a weeks respite care and it is all arranged. Now he has changed his mind. He sits in his chair and says I don't want to go and you can't make me. The atmosphere between us is poisonous. I know its not his fault but I feel like I'm dealing with a naughty si...

I have only just read your post. It might help you reach a decision if I told you about my own experience. A good friend of 40 years who lives a long way away became severely depressed after giving up her job to be a live-in carer for her mum for 10 years. I could not visit because of my own caring ...

Thanks for all the suggestions. I can still leave the house (although that may change in a few months), I belong to a couple of local groups and also to a carers' group. But it is the feeling that we are on different paths. I feel we should investigate anything that might help, and also I batter my ...

My partner was diagnosed with a terminal condition 8 years ago. His condition is getting steadily worse, but very slowly. I want us to make the best of the years we have left together, but he is stuck in depression. He refuses to come out with me even though he is still able to walk. The only times ...

<t>Hi Jenny, thanks for the support. He hates being in a situation where other people "tell him what to do". Therefore he resists the idea of seeing a doctor, a nurse, a physiotherapist, a paid carer, etc. When I try to discuss this, he retreats into saying "I don't feel well, and you nagging makes ...

<t>PS<br/> <br/> Lynne, it might not be possible for you to go away overnight, but you need to get out. Even a short break helps. When you shut the gate behind you, it will be your time, to concentrate on yourself. Could you investigate bus trips to nearby towns, see if the Rotary Club organises out...