PPS - you mention 'family farm'. So who is farming it now?

Am I right in thinking it's your mum who now has physical health problems, but the problems your dad has are more mental health problems. Where is your brother living? I'm going to ask you a tough question, but 'deliberately' to put this before you. If YOU 'went under a bus' tomorrow, what would act...

Martin - your best bet is having a relationship with another carer (just as, say, divorced folk have a lot in common, and so do single parents, etc etc). Maybe CUK should set up a Carers Friends corner somewhere, for just that purpose! You say you 'chose' but when we are children we 'accept' what is...

I've used 'All Clear' and the form guides you through what you need to declare or not. That said, I've never had to claim on it yet! What was helpful was that you used to be able to fill the form in without putting any personal info in, so you could see the impact on the policy of what you input med...

If there really is no WIll at all (check with the local soclitiors, or solicitors in any town he's lived in, saying you have Court of Protection authority to enquire), then he will die 'intestate'. From what I understand, when you die 'intestate' (ie, no will), the estate is divided up amongst relat...

Jan, I'm glad you're starting to get other folk involved, from SS/district nurse to cleaner/hospice. That's great - as you say, you are starting to 'get the ball rolling'. I'm afraid you are going to have to 'get tough' with your husband. HIs illness is not your fault, and he cannot justify his self...

Natalie- what's wrong with your mum? She's very young to need care - and YOU are very young to be providing it! Five years spent caring at your age is FAR too long. As I say, let's start by understanding what is wrong with your mum, and why she needs ANY care (ie, what her care NEEDS are - not neces...

Alan, I'm wondering whether, if your wife is sadly, 'heading towards the end of her life' (not by self-harming, but by virtue of what is ailing her) (if she is that immobile etc), would involving hospice-at-home care help? We usually think of hospices as places we 'go to die', but in fact they not o...

Reading the link Chris provided (very useful, thanks!), I re-emphasise how essential it is that your mum, and you, write NOW to the GP/SS/Home manager, stating categorically that you deplore any consideration of your g/father being sent home, and that on NO ACCOUNT will you be providing ANY care at ...

How a DOLs notice is 'imposed' on someone without their consent I don't know. With my MIL as her dementia developed, the care home merely asked me if I agreed to it and I said yes, and there it was. How they actually 'swung' it I don't know. But in my MIL's case it was about her safeguarding. She ke...