I then searched on 'Loyalty to an abusive parent', and found the following http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2013/02/abusive_parents_what_do_grown_children_owe_the_mothers_and_fathers_who_made.html (in this one, you need to read down a bit, past the first case history, to the pyschiatrist's ...
H, here are a few examples of the kind of organisations and forums to support adults who were abused in childhood - https://www.havoca.org/ https://napac.org.uk/ http://www.isurvive.org/forum/viewforum.php?f=22&sid=30ce5651232a892ef4486f40222d26d0 http://www.isurvive.org/forum/viewtopic.php?f=22&t=8...
I am confident I speak for all those who have responded to you (I don't think I'm out of place here, I hope not!) in saying that this forum most definitely tries to help those who come here 'in desperation' (that was me, a few years ago, though facing nothing nothing nothing like as dire a situation...
To be honest, H, I'm not sure I understand the situation you're describing. (????) You're saying on the one hand: "then i expect the family that ignores her needs and mine to come swarming to a house without her claiming care and concern..... sorry, but where tf where you all when she needed you" bu...
Gosh, that takes me back! I can remember that poem from when I was about 20, which is a LOOOOONNNNGGGG time ago!!!!!

I don't like the penultimate verse, though - pretty yukky.

(PS what on earth did I post that made you think of that poem? I can't imagine!!!!)
Gp receptionists are infamous for being appalling, alas. They seem to regard patients as a 'nuisance' from whom the god-like doctors shoulsd be protected at all costs! (I suppose in their favour they also have to cope with abusive drunk patients etc etc sometimes.) I once had to take my toddler son ...
(Yet another!) very calm and sane and sensible and wise post from Mrs A!! :)

(PS - I agree with everything she says - so she must be right!!!) :) :)
If you're going to pay in extra NI to boost your eventually pension, be sure you don't pay in more than you need to! The Forecasting Unit lady I spoke to (I MUST go and post the link!) was very good and pointed out to me something along the lines of 'it would be worth you paying two years extra, but...
What was it that you did not believe when she was 18? That seems to be the hook on which she is hanging all her anger and resentment and malice at you on! I agree with the others - it's her life, her responsibility to be happy. If you have apologised for your 'crime' at 18, and mean it, she should a...
Oscar, I would say that you are doing the wrong thing for the right reason. Your heart is doing the 'right thing' but it is the wrong thing for your friend. As others are pointing out, your 'support' for her (not questioning that it IS support) is acting to enable this impossible and unsustainable s...