Hi Janet and welcome to the forum. First of all well done for being your sister’s ‘rock’. Secondly, there comes a time in every carer’s journey when it starts to become too much. Dementia is a cruel thing and affects the family more than the sufferer. It cannot be managed by one person alone. Your s...
Hi Robert, I realise my thoughts aren’t about what you are asking for information on. However your plans, although sounding like a wonderful solution made me wonder whether you have considered the practicalities of daily living too. As I understand your plans from your post, they are to arrange for ...
Hi Rachel, Welcome to the forum. Sounds like you have your hands full. I can't help with the booze problem - no experience. I expect you have gone on the al-anon website, which I think helps relatives of people with alcohol dependency? Just wanted to say 'Hi' and by all means vent away. From what I ...
Oh gosh, I had a much better experience than anyone on this thread. I seem to remember that I contacted a continence nurse myself. Mum was supplied with ‘panties’ for a while but eventually had ‘tenna’ large size full capacity continence pads which ‘velcroed’ around her waist. She was supplied with ...
Hi Andrea. Stop kicking yourself about ‘not loving’ your husband. There is a vast difference between being ‘in love’ with someone, loving someone who could be a parent, child sibling or old aunty, and loving someone who needs your care. Your husband has changed. He is no longer the man you married, ...
Hi Carol Kim, First of all take on board the fact that no adult legally HAS to care for any other adult, whether it be spouse, parent, adult child or sibling. I say this to give you a solid base to ‘plant your feet on’. Secondly consider how you would feel if your elderly mum died without you being ...
Hiya, I googled DID because I'm completely ignorant about it and found this site. You probably already know it, but just in case? www.firstpersonplural.org.uk It must be very hard on you both. Perhaps you would benefit from professional help yourself, in order for you to understand what's the best w...
Hi Samantha, I know less than nothing about it!! But I wonder if this is something to do with his 'self employed' status, in that he may now be earning (they think) more than the amount allowed to receive carer's allowance. He must earn less than £123 a week (after deductions) apparently. Have you k...
Hi Jane, Just wanted to say ‘hello and welcome’. Sorry to hear about your husband’s big op and the consequences you are both left with. Well done you for coping with the ‘ritual’, many wouldn’t be able to face it. What are your days like? Is hubby able to get out and about? Are you both able to soci...
Hi Carole, It’s not just the days, where you might be able to organise plenty of help from nurses and carers – note I say might! It’s the nights! In the Home Mum has a team of people who are on that particular shift and on call. Could you manage constantly getting out of bed to either check on her o...