You have all my sympathy. At the end of the day, you have to put YOU first and you really have gone far beyond what most would have done. I had to threaten my late father's GP Surgery with a legal letter when I said I was NOT going to care for him and he was a vulnerable adult, and the NHS had a Dut...

I wish you all the very best. You have all my sympathy. I am trying to care for my much older husband who is deemed to have 'mental capacity' despite his lack of self care and medical non compliance. Is it worth contacting a solicitor if you do not get anywhere with the GP? You cannot be responsible...

I totally agree. I care for my much older 82 year old husband. I am 59. When he dies, I will lose his state pension although I think the second state pension will be partially paid to me when I meet retirement age . Yes he has a private ssp but that is going down very quickly. I would happily look f...

I agree too. I am going to keep on wearing my mask, social distance and avoid crowded places and shop early when I need to go out - thankfully most grocery shopping done online. That said, I am going to socialise as and when I can with trusted friends who are similarly careful ideally meeting where ...

Thank you - let me get next week over firsst. I do have 17 cats - they are in joint names. When we semi retired we started showing and then breeding although I had to stop as i never let any kittens go. Last litter nearly 4. So holidays are not an option and a sacrifice I happily made. I have to say...

Husband 82 - much older and have been married 31 years. Always been very controlling and difficult and prone to threats. I will ask him to put whatever appears in the sample tomorrow. Yes I think the appaling diet does contribute Fortisips and vodka.Today he has had 2 Fortisips, a tin of peaches and...

There is no way I can leave the house as I would NEVER leave the cats with him as he may well let them out and then play the 'nice little old man ' card as in 'the cats got past me'. If I called the police, they would want ME to leave and I cannot do that.

Thanks BB - I may have to ask a friend to show me how to record on my mobile but if he saw me doing it then this could be a real problem - he is still 2st heavier than me. I would never ask the ambulance service to come out for incontinence as I could be diverting staff from someone who needed them....

I do not have much faith in SS or testing for mental capacity, especially without support of his GP Pet. I dare not risk challenging him. If I got them involved, and they believed him not me, then frankly I dare not take that risk. All I can do is hope for a crisis and that the astmha gets worse or ...

Heart goes out to you Ayay. I totally understand how very hard it is. We have no contact with Social Services as yet. I guess I have to get the re wiring over and then see how things progress but his GP is as useful as a chocolate teapot.