David, I did not have health PoA for my husband but he had written a letter saying he wanted me to be given information about his health and treatment. If you don't want to use your PoA yet and think your Mum has capacity could she do this? It might give you a bit more access to the professionals.

Fourth day today - that means you have already managed three days (maybe even four by the time you read this) - well done! It was never going to be easy, but you have been heroic. Look forward to your real holiday later on. Can you find something nice for yourself when you get home again? Something ...

Have you been able to get any feedback from staff in the Unit your Dad is currently in? I wonder, too, who is responsible for his medical care while he is in this Unit and what they think - for example, is his condition currently stable or likely to deteriorate. Anything which supports your view or ...

Hello Sally I am sorry you have both reached this point. I looked after my husband after his terminal diagnosis with carers four times a day. We, too, had to move downstairs. A few random thoughts for tonight, to add to what others have said, but I'd be happy to answer any specific questions if I ca...

Mark, this rollercoaster of your father leaving and then coming back must be grim for you. I have cross-posted with everyone else, but I'll let it stand in case it's useful. Just to start the thoughts off, what does the care package say the carers will actually do for your father? (You don't need to...

Beverley, I know it's easy for someone outside your situation to say it, but you must make sure you are safe. You will be no help to your daughter if not. If you are ever at risk, dial 999. In any case, please write down everything before the Social Services visit so you don't forget anything and so...

I have been a former carer for a year. You might relate to some of the things I experienced, but we are all different, so please ignore anything unhelpful. Please remind yourself (especially if no-one else is telling you) that you have done well to look after your father for so long. Even those 'goo...

I just wanted to say hello. My caring situation was very different but there will be someone along soon who understands more of what you are experiencing. This is a good place to stop feeling so alone.

It is very early days. I am sorry you were not told what to expect before your mother was discharged. From memory of what I was told about my husband, she will be very tired, could experience mood/character changes, be forgetful and have poor concentration. I'd suggest you involve your mother's GP. ...

With my husband, the rehabilitation ward team organised a pre-discharge meeting. A nurse, the Occupational Therapist, a Social Services rep, OH and I all attended. As OH was going to be self-funding, he did not have to have a financial assessment as well, but your Dad will need one. However, I have ...