I am so very sorry to hear this, Pet. He is at peace now and you were a wonderful wife to him, dedicated to the end. You could have done no more.

Hope your family are a comfort to you. Thinking of you all,
Anne x

Hi Jack, I don't live too far away from Dagenham and am aware of the lack of support in general .... It may be worth asking these people for advice though: https://www.lbbd.gov.uk/services-for-people-with-disabilities Also, I see the DADB vans in Dagenham quite a bit. Could pick their brains too: ht...

Linda, my mum always voted even when she had dementia. Funnily enough, she always remembered her political views! I agree with Melly unless your mother has been officially declared by medical professionals as having no capacity, not the same as dementia, you are doing no harm. I would agree that she...

Definitely, I used to take notes in a notebook at the front. At the back I kept all the contact numbers. Very helpful when you can quote a conversation back from three weeks ago. Also, use a wipe off noteboard for caree's reminders (or for notes you want to leave for other people coming in), togethe...

That sounds dreadful, Diane. What a situation to be in. Above all else, you need to stand firm. You cannot and will not be available should they refuse to fund mum's care home. Smart technology is not a substitute for human care. Yes, you should have a copy of the Carers Assessment. If they refuse t...

Hi Alice,

I have flagged your post for a staff member to respond.

Sorry that you have not found the Forum useful. But do feel free to try again. It does take a while to get used to "chatting" to strangers ..

Take care,
Anne

Hi Yasmine, Welcome to the Forum and sorry to hear about nan. The Alzheimers Society has many useful articles on this but in short, I would suggest that you try to enter her world and agree with her, provide reassurance, stay calm etc. There is little point in trying to get her to enter your world s...

Hi Wendy, And welcome to the Forum. I am ex carer but was also an only child caring for an elderly stubborn but much loved mother. If you are to continue caring for her, you need regular breaks. Who knows, she may appreciate you more when you return?? I know it is very difficult but if she gets atte...

Hi Faye, A confusing maze of information but you are right to be prepared ahead of the game. Either the local council or the manager of a local care home should be able to give you an indication of the maximum the council will pay. In my own area (London borough) it is around £800 per week. You are ...

Just sending ((hugs)) to Penny and MrsA. Penny, we have all been there and, as you rightly say, your mum will not remember. The only person you are upsetting is you. We all know the theory of what we should do in those moments but when you are tired, stressed, it is very difficult to remember.