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I am proud to be called a CARER !!! - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

I am proud to be called a CARER !!!

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Perhaps if we all stood up and said we are proud to be carers we would be a force to be recognised, not individuals who can be dismissed as 'only' a carer, by the ss, the nhs and any one else who thinks this way.
6 million, or whatever the figure is, make a large proportion of the population who cannot be ignored IF we all stand up and declare, with pride, that we are a carer.
But we all minimise that aspect of our lives and say what we work at to define ourselves and sometimes don't even mention that we are a carer as well.
I am a person in my own right and what I do does not define who I am, but in my life I have been proud to be many persona's........daughter, wife, mother, homemaker, teacher, the list is as varied as my life, as anyone's life, but they have all required a variety of skills to achieve so now I have no problem with proudly proclaiming
I can only comment on my own circumstances Myrtle and although I do understand what you say, I cannot equate the feeling of desperation I had on the same level with pride. Does that makes sense? What I mean is, I cannot think of any other role or job in life that I would expect to feel proud at being subject to daily abuse from someone close, not being able to have the most basic rights afforded to me, such as half an hour to have a tea when I needed it, getting a shower without having to come and sort out another situation? Was I proud of my home getting smashed up, the police being called because somebody thought my daughters screams meant she was being assaulted, embarrassment, exhaustion, mental anguish..no, I wasn't proud.

Proud and happy go together. For a lot of the time, I was neither. I try and take the good from every situation but I do think that, no matter how many we are in number, we can indeed be ignored. Reason being-we will continue to care and those that you mention such as the NHS and SS know it. We can fight to improve our lot and we can certainly get some issues recognised but bottom line is, they know we will not abandon our carees to systems that are often faulty. So they feed us platitudes every so often.

Anyway, as I said, I can only speak of my own personal experience and feelings in regard to the topic of pride at the time of caring..others will obviously feel very differently. I am, however, proud of everything I have achieved despite being a carer..that is a different issue all together. I love my daughter with all my heart but if I had my time again, I would do things differently without a doubt.
I don't think there's any one of us who wouldn't second guess some of our decisions over the years. Hindsight is a cruel master. It's always right. Even when it isn't. Just because a decision is wrong with hindsight doesn't mean a thing. It was a good decision at the time - we're human. By definition that means we make mistakes, and I've made some glorious ones over the years.

But when I see my autistic son trying hard to say "As-salam alaykum" to the waiter in an Indian restaurant (wrong greeting but nice try), I realise I can't have done too badly.

It's important to take the good, as well as the bad. The bad stuff's easy to spot.

A carer and proud
Ladybird, you have every right to feel proud of yourself, you've moved mountains!

I think actually Charles has it the right way round

A carer and proud!
I agree with all the sentiments posted so far. Yes, I too have at times gone down to the pit of despair and never thought I was going to see the light. Yes, I agree it would be great to be seen as something other than a Carer, but as one other person noted we have MANY IDENTITIES. Since my birth I have had many labels and identities given to me by others or myself, and there have have many changes in my life, but deep down at the soul level I know who I really am.

For all the views already given is the reason we should be 'proud be be called a carer' because we have earnt to be called this with the very sacrifice we have made to look after our loved ones, friends or neighbours whether because out of choice or not.

Let us remind ourselves those 'support workers' are paid to care; they do their caring and then leave, whereas we true unpaid Carers have the responsibility 24/7.

As one other person said, if we all stand together to affirm the role of the unpaid 'Carer' and raise society's consciousness of who is the true 'Carer' then we will be noticed and be able to influence change for the better.

Also, we need to remember the Young Carers. I'm certainly very proud of them and humbled with how they deal with caring for others.

I am a Carer and proud to be one!!
Am I proud to be a carer yes. Not for the the way in which the government pats me on the back and says your doing a great job. I care for my step son with complex issues and most days are up and down but we manage. I have also been a child carer, cared for my mother father,husband, and brother sadly all passed away. While each role has been different and brought there own challenges they have made me who I am. When I have to fill in forms where it asks about occupation I will always put unpaid carer 24/7. There are still many challenges to face we all need to stand together.
Yes I am proud to be a carer. Although at times I think many people seem to think I am lazey. And just lead a nice life. Not so at the best of times. Life never stops. I am utterly exhausted but that s another story ! But I have been a carer for over 25 years. Regards Amanda
Am I proud to be a carer.......TBH I don't know.

I can see other members sentiments on the subject, and fully support their views, but I have a different out look on the matter.

With the recent witch hunt that this government has imposed on people on benefits, along with the trash TV Benefit Street & the like, to me it's made me feel that we are second class citizens.

The government can pat me on the back all they like, it has no effect, so until the role of carer at home is recognized as a proper job so to speak in society, and not a means to a free life style, the pat on the back means nothing.

For over 20yrs now I've looked after my partner, she is steadily getting worst year by year, yet still have to endure assessments, four up till now, the constant threat that your entitlement will be taken away from you at the stroke of the pen hangs over us like a black cloud.

Beginning the role of carer for my partner took me/her away from a good job/pension/lifestyle/holidays etc, to a life living from week to week, and struggling to get by.

Further cuts are coming, the Tory's have already told us that, and it will be the ones at the bottom who will suffer for the rich to get richer.

When people ask me am I working, I tell them I'm a carer for my partner, their reply is, so your on benefits, I can tell you now that the role of a home carer is not recognized by 90% of the public, the media hype lately has seen to that.

So, I doubt I see myself as been proud to be a carer.. :(
I think acceptance of being a carer is a very gradual process. Mine probably started about 2000 when my responsibilities increased due to aging parent and then increased significantly with illness of parent in 2009. I still didn't think of myself as carer, so continued to work full time, until a stroke for caree and then I began chosing my full time work contracts around being at home, then continued for 2 and half years to be both full time employed plus full time carer which really wasn't working. Not sure I regarded myself as a carer during the first part but towards the end, the caring bit was taking over and work was s uffering . I didn't like the job anyway so leaving wasn't much of an issue and I soon found more work that fitted it-yes caring!. To start with I was rather embarassed about leaving the job and "just doing care". I must say that since then my head is now in the right place, and I tell people I care and why I choose to do care work. When I used to tell people waht I did , people would grimace as it was that sort of job! Now when I tell people you can see they respect you, and take an interest in what you do. I think there is a lot of old fashioned snobbery about care work because it used to be the sort of job unqualified school leavers walked into instead of signing on but I think things have changed and people's perceptions have changed-not least my own. Yes I am proud to be a carer.
As for people thinking you are lazy, I always feel family think I am lazy- so last week was good when I had a break, and they had a small taster of what life is like at my end. One of the comments I had was "It's all quite time consuming isn't it?" He He :lol: .
I'm proud of being a carer yes I think that we should be highlighted under a name.
people ask what I do when I mention a carer they think that I'm a lay about
I would like them to look after someone with a learning disability.
I think acceptance of being a carer is a very gradual process.
Hi Henrietta, maybe so, but until this government stands up and writes it in stone, putting home carers in a different sector, the public will categorize everyone the same on benefits.

The biggest slice of the bill is for pensioners, but you don't see them getting slagged off on channel 5 for claiming, that wouldn't make good viewing would it... :whistle:

Until that time I'm still sitting on the fence with " I'm proud to be a carer" :)