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Stay in for up to four months possible - Page 2 - Carers UK Forum

Stay in for up to four months possible

Guidance on coronavirus and a place to share concerns and support
My dad lives with me, lung cancer and steroid dependant so high risk but fortunately on immunotherapy not chemo so not the super high risk.

I've worked really hard the past few months on resisting his manipulations to be at his beck and call as physically, he's able to live independently and doesn't need a carer as such. I've managed to get into a position where I sort his meds as he gets a bit muddled and I go with him to appointments difficult to get to on the bus. But I refuse to stay home 24/7 to be company for him, as he'd prefer.

Fortunately I work from home so massive coronavirus risk reduction there. I'm prepared to exercise by walking instead of swimming to reduce risk and get online food shopping too.

But I just can't be in the house 24/7 with him. My partner lives 150 miles away, long distance suits us perfectly. I go to see him every other weekend and get a much needed break. He's retired, so his lifestyle is v low risk really.

I'm massively struggling with self preservation v guilt. If I don't have my alternate weekend breaks as planned, my mental health will tank (have had bad depression in the past and anxiety is high now)
But if I do, am I being horrendously selfish and putting him at risk? My aunt text me this morning to remind me he's high risk and I must not let people visit us, it should only be me in the house.

If I never go out, he could catch it in the hospital waiting rooms for the many appointments, the tesco delivery driver. Nothing is risk free. But if I go out and he gets it, no one will think oh I bet it was that waiting room that done him in. Nope.. It'll be his selfish daughter knew he was high risk buy chose to go gadding about with her boyfriend
Anyone else ripping the self's apart with guilt / this conundrum?
Apologies for the long rant!
I care for my wife who had a severe stroke, has compromised immune system, asthma and Kidney disease. I live with her and my 17yo son in a small property. We have taken the step to self isolate, including my son coming out of college as he can have work posted online. My main worry now comes with the carers who visit to attend to my wife personal needs. She has 3 carers 4 times a day. Has anyone had any discussions or reassurances from their care company as we havent yet. Also do you think I am over reacting it was a hard decision to make especially where my son was concerned
Graham_20031 wrote:
Tue Mar 17, 2020 10:04 am
Has anyone had any discussions or reassurances from their care company as we havent yet.

Yes, (and apologies for putting this up a second time):-
What we are doing:

Refreshing staff on effective hand hygiene procedures and ensuring alcohol hand gels are provided. You can do your part by ensuring a sink with soap and a towel to dry their hands is available when carers are visiting.
Asking staff to inform us if they have recently travelled to any affected areas (as laid out in PHE guidance)
Developing a system to manage service provision in the event of a fall in capacity due to large-scale school closures or staff sickness or absence. This could involve call times being changed, call lengths reduced where appropriate, or changes to personnel. We will be in contact with you directly if this is necessary, and will keep you updated.

What you can do:

Increase the frequency and thoroughness of your own hand-washing as this is the most effective protection against the virus.
Ensure soap and hot water is provided to staff to wash their hands, and either paper hand towels or a clean, regularly changed towel for them to dry their hands with.
Although it is still business as usual, in the unlikely event of wide-scale school closures and staff sickness and absence, please bear with us if there are changes to your schedule.
Go out in your cars for a run round for some relief from the 4 month
Park in a supermarket car park say, without getting out, and watch all the loonies loading toilet
rolls into their cars.
I haven't a car Albert! At the moment very few toilet rolls to be purchased. That will change I'm sure. Will be going for a walk.
My son said at tea time it's not much different than normal - this self isolation lark. (Due to my underlying condition,)

Says it all really.

Carees and carers are socially isolated anyway.

I have ordered myself a mini indoor trampoline for extra exercise, I shall have daily exercise to music.

My sons hopefully will have a go too.

Has a bar to hold onto so hopefully cant fall off!
I completely dread the thought. It unnerves me.

How do you cope with being on isolation or lockdown continually too? Please give me some tips on how to constructively entertain a young child. Advice and suggestions welcome in addition. I am currently struggling to make a list of activities to do at home. So far all I can think of is card games. I do not want him watching more than one hour of telly either. Recommendations appreciated. I have already tried some art and craft projects. If it was summer I would take him to a park or to the woods for a quick walk but that is out of the question due to the bad weather. So what do you recommend? I still need to make a list. Also any apps.

I have stopped paying attention to the news. It seems silly at this point. My partner and I have decided against total self isolation but we do make sure he washes his hands often. I have no idea of the current numbers anymore. I have briefly looked at the information posters in town however. And we also planned a relaxing weekend away by ourselves without the kids in tow on our houseboat. I have even doubled up on his bladder medication and stocked up on art supplies as a additional precaution. The only other thing I can do is check up on my neighbors and pray.
Once people have stocked up, the supermarkets will return to normal.
After all, there is a limit to how much can be stored in a house...…
..unless they upsize and buy a bigger house ! :)
Hi Thara_1910
When my kids were little we used to make 'tents' using the dining table, chairs and bedsheets. They were allowed to eat their tea inside. That's if you don't mind your home being upside down for a few hours!

Cloudygal,
I love your mini trampoline idea, let us know how you get on. I got my partner some exercise dvds aimed at people with mobility problems but who are able to do gentle movements while sitting.
Tina, it's not an ideal world. Some of the comments I've seen on TV have been ridiculous. We can all try to MINIMISE the risk, but there is risk in every day life. Dad is probably entitled to services from Social Services staff, but they will be going from house to house visiting the most vulnerable, and at the end of the day, they will have to go shopping, will go back to their families etc. etc. Dad could go into a nursing home, but would he be any safer there? Very unlikely, because the more people there are anywhere, the greater the risk. I suggest that you keep living your life as you are, being sensible, washing your hands regularly, etc. etc.
I'm also in the high risk group, but someone needs to go shopping. There is a risk driving a car, even in your own home there are risks.