My sister & I look after our elderly parents. Mum is 80 with Parkinsons, continence issues, arthritis & hypotension as well as other bits and bobs. Dad will soon be 80 and is diabetic, has osteoporosis in his spine, arthritis and is generally just getting older & frailer & forgetful with each passing day.
Both my sister & I have health issues of our own (she's diabetic and ceoliac: I've fibromyalgia & perncious anaemia with a dash of severe IBS thrown in for good measure), and I try to work full time - though between my health issues and hospital/doctor appts - well, let's just say I have a very supportive line management at work, for which I am very very grateful, but I do feel guilty that I can't fulfil my contractual terms and that I end up with menial tasks even though I do have a reasonable level of intelligence. One day they will have to sack me, or I will have to resign and I have no idea how we'll cope with the financial situation. However, one tries to keep some form of perspective - I'll deal with it when it happens (I hope)! lol
I just find it incredibly lonely - the friends I had when I was well and when I didn't have as much responsibility at home - they're still there but they don't find it easy dealing with someone who can't just drop everything and go out for a day or an evening or have to cancel at the last minute.
After the last round of hospital admissions, I have managed to get some care organised - we have an OT and some professional carers who come in twice a day to help get mum up and dressed and into bed at night, which helps give us a little bit extra time for those nagging things like housework. I'm hoping for some respite but money is tight so even if I can get it, I won't be heading off for a nice restful few days away, I might be able to have a day or two out and that would be nice.
My escape is the internet, my cats and my painting & knitting (in the winter) and embroidery/tapestry (in the summer) as well as fiddling in the garden - but more intensive things & things which require more commitment - difficult as the firbo can flare at any time and not always with warning.
My sister & I have been caring for 10 years now, not surprisingly, it is getting more intensive.
And that's the readers digest version of life at the moment.
to the forum.
This went on for about a year (I'd occasionally leave food out for him) and then he turned up one lunchtime limping badly. I took him to the vets thinking he'd been bitten or attacked or whatever only to find out that he'd been in an accident (a car most likely the vet felt) and I was faced with an awful choice - have his back leg amputated or put him down. The massive softy that I am, I begged & borrowed the money for the amputation and now he lives here too. Lacking a back leg doesn't stop him climbing fences and such! I'm definitely owned by the cats! And they know just how to get me to do what they want me to do 