Power of Attorney - finances

Tell us a bit about yourself here.
Maybe it should be short and ' sweet' Or......, If you both are unable to arrange a mutual time and place to discuss these issues,as a family, I will have no alternative but to make decisions on my own.
I don't know if this will work, or any help to you.My feeling and concern is that you cannot continue with this added pressure. What will they do if you become ill??
Probably they would say - I thought she had all this sorted!! She only had to ask.... Problem is if i go ahead - then it could be step 2 - talking to her as suggested earlier by Susieq saying people do this nowadays.

I have seen this twisting and turning (with my brothers) which I have found upsetting, denying something has been said (although of no particular relevance has been a good lesson for the future.) Hence, now emails and very careful not to get into any form of conversation.

P.S. Since the last email she has phone and apologized for being a nuisance. Her door lock wasn't working and can my husband drive to look at and he said he would. I talked her through it and when she said the thing is sticking out so the door will not close. I said you need to close the door together and then lock it. No - she was insistent that it was broken.

I tipped my husband off as one day I went down and found the door not shut but the part that goes in the frame sticking out. (so it couldn't close) I didn't tell her she hadn't shut her door properly.

So - yes - she had done exactly the same. It seems sometimes her 'brain' works and next minute it stops with confusion. Every day waiting for the morning and night time feels as though you are on edge. My brothers don't get this at all.
That's brought back a memory. Hubby was( is?) a very intelligent man. I was at our daughters, and he phoned asking me how to lock the front door. Couldn't believe it. When I arrived home, he had been spraying WD40 on it. Nothing wrong with the door. I told an admiral nurse about it much later, after he had been diagnosed. Apparently it's common.
You take care of yourself. You are in such a dilemma by the sounds of it. All so awful and sad.
Gilly_1709 wrote:
Tue Sep 26, 2017 10:25 am
I think that makes perfect sense. BUT - when you have two other siblings (who are in their own world) then anything I do would be criticized. (Two 'intelligent men' have not said 'we need to sit down and talk about Mum's finances'.)

She also would say .... has a bank account now with my money in it.

I am just feeling so tired of it all now and I know this has to be a natural feeling.
Hi Gilly
I have known intelligent men ( and the occasional intelligent woman) behave like ostriches when faced with illness or difficult emotional decisions. Burying one's head or ignoring the issue until it goes away.
Not a realistic option but a very common reaction.
I'd suggest you call a family meeting to discuss all Mums care issues, if you dont start talking togehter now , it will become much more difficult to do later on,a nd you will just get left with more and more to do and get more and more tried
Xx
MrsA
Just caught up on later posts
I think you need to take the lead on this rather then asking them what they would do. You know so much more than them already. You are more experienced and have more information,. You need to adopt the role of Care Manager and tell them the options (or the solution if there is only one) rather than expecting them to come up trumps. You'll need to be clear what you want them to do.
Good luck
MrsA
I'd just say what I propose to do and why, if they don't like it what do they think would be better.