Need Help Understanding...Maybe some life Advice too.

For information and discussion about benefits
Hi guys new around here and super new to carers and disability benefits which is why I am here.

So here is my situation. My mother who I still live with (I'm 27) she had a accident many years ago and she isn't able to work. For this from what I understand that my mother and my father (who is the carer) receives a number of benefits listed below.

DWP EESA
DWP DLA
DWP CA
DWP AA

I have no idea what these are or mean. These are just what comes up on my fathers bank statement. Also not sure anyone else is going to recognize these.

So here is where this becomes a complicated situation.

My Father is a Alcoholic, He drinks everyday (If he has the money to do so). He is very toxic when he is drunk especially towards my mother nothing physical just verbal but imo is just as bad a physical. I've tried and tried to get him to stop but he isn't going to, He just doesn't want to.

Recently I have found out that my dad has been going on a dating site, This dating site is such a scam for one. They hire people to speak to people to build online relationships. They charge you for you to send messages and it's pretty expensive to do so.

He has been messaging this women for the past 18 months and I couldn't tell you how much money he has wasted on this site. This past week or two he has probably spent around £400. Given that we have rent and bills to pay we cannot actually afford this.

So my question is how can I get these payments switched to me so I'm the official carer for her. My mother wants this too but she doesn't really know who to contact as my dad deals with this all.

Also can I even be a carer for my mother? I am a professional online poker player. So I work from home. In the eyes of the government, I think they would see me as unemployed as a poker player cannot be taxed as of now.
I am in the process of trying to get into a new career though.

I probably should add that my mother doesn't need 24/7 care she is able to be independent to a degree, Meaning she can get through day to day without somebody but she needs a hand here and there.

Now to the very last thing. If I get these payments made to me then my Father literally wouldn't have a single penny of income. Now I don't want to do this to him but I feel like I'm being forced to do this. It's actually going to be like I'm treating him like a child.

I think that's all for now. If I think of anything else then I will add it. If you have any questions please feel free to ask and I will do my best to answer. Sorry this is a bit long and a bit of a complicated situation I actually have no clue who I can talk to.
Hi Simon, welcome to the forum.
AA = Attendance Allowance for someone over 65 who is disabled
DLA = Disability Living Allowance for someone under 65 and disabled
CA = Carers Allowance for someone caring for someone disabled in receipt of either DLA or AA

Mum is entitled to have her own benefits paid into her own bank account. All she has to do is set up her account and give DWP the account number.
If she wants you to deal with everything for her, then DWP have an "appointee" scheme. Google this for more information.
I'm not clear why dad is classed as disabled? (I can't think of how Mum can have both DLA as well as AA).

For you to become dad's appointee you'd have to get it agreed that he lacked "mental capacity".

For an in depth discussion in confidence, contact our Carers UK helpline. The phone line is usually busy, but you can email them and they will get back to you.
ESA. Employment and support allowance.

DLA is being phased out and replaced by PIP
You need to know your mother National Insurance number.
Ask your mother to write to the DWP to request tat nominee be changed to you, or she could request that the money could be paid into a different account
You also need to ask your mother if she knows when she will reach Retirement Pension age?
Colin_1705 wrote:You need to know your mother National Insurance number.
Ask your mother to write to the DWP to request tat nominee be changed to you, or she could request that the money could be paid into a different account

Hi sorry for the very delayed response, ughh it's been such a struggle with dealing with my dad. My mother wants him gone from the house and so do I. But if he goes he'll literally have 0 place to go and 0 income, So I feel super bad about doing this. The next thing I can do is just treat him like a child and get all of my parents income come to me. Pay the bills and then give what's left over to my mother and then she can use it in what ever way she wants.

Regarding the above with what you wrote is there a Address and/or a website I can look at? I did contact someone about it not exactly sure who just some GOV email address I guess and they basically shut me down and we can't deal with this for you.
Simon is your Mum is in receipt of any DWP benefits then her NI number will appear alongside the payments made into her bank account.
Simon,
All you need is the DWP Appointee Application form.
Note that you will need for mum, and one for dad, if he gives his permission - do you really want to do this for dad as well?
If dad left home, he would still be entitled to his own benefits. Mum would be entitled to her own benefits, but if she became single, not one of a couple, the rate would change.

Please, please ring or email our helpline for detailed accurate information, I can only tell you what I know from dealing with my carees situation.
bowlingbun wrote:Simon,
All you need is the DWP Appointee Application form.
Note that you will need for mum, and one for dad, if he gives his permission - do you really want to do this for dad as well?
If dad left home, he would still be entitled to his own benefits. Mum would be entitled to her own benefits, but if she became single, not one of a couple, the rate would change.

Please, please ring or email our helpline for detailed accurate information, I can only tell you what I know from dealing with my carees situation.
Please could you give me the email address to contact your help team?
Simon_17071 wrote: Please could you give me the email address to contact your help team?
Need expert advice? You can talk to the Carers UK Adviceline five days a week, no matter where you are in the UK or how complex your query is. We do benefits checks and advise on financial and practical matters related to caring.

Freephone: 0808 808 7777
email: advice@carersuk.org
Open Monday to Friday, 10am to 4pm

The Carers UK Adviceline also includes a listening service, there for you to talk through your caring situation with a trained volunteer who understands what you are going through. Available Mondays and Tuesdays, from 9am to 7pm.

If you can’t get through on the phones (lines are often oversubscribed) then send them an email, they’ll usually get back to you within 3-5 working days.