My dad diagnosed with vascular dementia

For issues specific to caring for someone with dementia.
Mum noticed changes in dad over last 12 months,forgetting frustrated always checking things we spoke about getting him the doctors but obviously scared finally a month ago dad got very frustrated so they both went to Drs myself and husband attended memory clinic,he then wished for an appointment for an MRI scan he had that the day before my father inlaw passed away sadly on the 7th July mum myself and my husband sat with the dr who has diagnosed vascular dementia 7 days before his 70th birthday he is 70 on Friday,all I have done is cry I can't loose my dad not to this sat and nursed sad inlaw with his care workers watched him take his last breathe can't do it with my dad or mother inlaw.

BROKEN
Sorry to read this Tracie.
You will cope, because you love your dad.
My husband is in a nursing home because of strokes and vascular dementia. It's IS very heartbreaking, but nothing will change it sadly. Over the last 20months I've found the strength to cope. So have my lovely daughter's and grandchildren. It's not easy, despairing at times, but what's the alternative. Only you can decide on that.
Practical terms, has your mum got Power of Attorney?
Contact the Alzheimer's society for advice and support.
Or, if are fortunate to have Admiral nurses in your area, they are a wonderful support. We're to me anyway.
We have one nurse in our area,as for Alzheimer's society when father inlaw was diagnosed they never did anything for us same for mother inlaw but will look at the website.
No advice but sending hugs. Sorry you are going through so much right now. Dementia is one of the hardest things to cope with.
Sorry to read this Tracie. You're right, it is awful and very sad. My Mum is 93 and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's last autumn. So she has old age, Alzheimer's and poor mobility but we still have a laugh sometimes and I take her out as much as I can. She is now in a care home.

The best thing we've done is to find a dementia support group and she absolutely loves it. I pick her up from the home and take her there for about 2 hours. Lovely people, lovely volunteers, coffee and cakes, a lovely bright venue and a garden courtyard when the weather is fine. I can chat to other carers, they have Age UK person in once a month if we need advice. They do quizzes, sing a longs, games etc. But you just do what you fancy.

I think it would help you and your Dad if you could find a nice group. It's a really happy, lively atmosphere at our group. Xxx
So sorry to hear this, Tracie. My mum had mixed dementia (Vascular / Alzheimers). The doctors can prescribe medication which will slow down the progression of the illness. In the meantime, get as much help as you can. The only real advice I can give is to enjoy the good times with your dad, of which there will be plenty. Cherish those, as they will help you through.

And of course talk to us. We have all sadly been there and got the t-shirt.
Has he got photogra ph albums. And biscuit tins full of photographs for you to look through with him?
Hi Tracie,
Sending you lots of love and hugs.
My dad is 68 tomorrow and he was diagnosed last year.
With vascular dementia, physical health is very important.
Things like blood pressure, weight and diabetes are risk factors, so keeping those under control can help keep the dementia under control too.
Trying to keep Dad as stimulated as possible will help too - exercise his mind as much as possible.
Hello

My grandmother has also got vascular Dementia. Watching her gradually get worse has been hard. And a very testing time for the family. But what I have learnt is to make each day count.
I work for the Alzheimer's Society and run weekly Dementia Cafes. I have met so many carers who have expressed the same concerns.
Allow your self to grieve, that is apart of walking through a life changing diagnosis. Also make sure that you reach out and get as much support as possible. My family got in touch with social services and a care package was put in place for my grandmother, which has effected her quality of life. Where she now goes out, and takes part in community activities and has various carers coming in. Through this walk with your father there will be days, that are hard but also days with your father that will be special and amazing! Which will stay with you. As a family we are trying to capture every special moment. Yes it is hard because she is getting worse, but every time we make her smile, it is like a bandage soothing our pain. Be strong you can get through this! I support you all the way!
Thank you everyone

I know where it will end that's what's upsetting me I look at him and want to cry,he has mum at home and he can still go out so at the moment groups are not needed or daycare,been through it with father inlaw who I lost eight weeks ago and also my mother inlaw has it