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Bad Christmas jokes

Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2016 7:04 pm
by rosemary
What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Claustrophobia!

Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can 'ho ho ho'!

Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?
Because he had a low "elf" esteem!

What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?
A Holly Davidson!

What do you call a cat in the desert?
Sandy Claws!

Who delivers presents to cats?
Santa Paws!

What do you call a dog who works for Santa?
Santa Paws!

What do you call Father Christmas in the beach?
Sandy Clause!

What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective?
Santa Clues!

What did the sea Say to Santa?
Nothing! It just waved!

What does Santa do with fat elves?
He sends them to an Elf Farm!

What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?
A Christmas Quacker!

Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas?
Santa Jaws

What says Oh Oh Oh?
Santa walking backwards!

What is Santa's favourite place to deliver presents?
Idaho-ho-ho!

Why does Santa go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
Because it 'soots' him!

Who is Santa's favorite singer?
Elf-is Presley!

:blush: :blush: :blush: :blush: :blush:

You have any to add?

x

Re: Bad Christmas jokes

Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2016 7:17 pm
by Pet66
Just couldn't compete with those Rosemary lol. Very entertaining xx

Re: Bad Christmas jokes

Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2016 8:37 pm
by Elaine
Store Detective: Madame, you have just left the store without paying for the items in your bag.
Woman: Of course I haven't paid. They were all labelled 'Gift'.

Re: Bad Christmas jokes

Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2016 11:56 am
by Irene_1509
Brilliant Rosemary, can't wait to try them out on my grandchildren this afternoon. They will love them.

Re: Bad Christmas jokes

Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2016 5:07 pm
by rosemary
:blush: :blush: :lol:
x